Hanging By a Thread

Bookmarked {a Collector of Information}

I have a problem. I collect information…recipes, bits on a new law, a list of clever hacks, ideas for using mason jars, a list of science projects to do with my kids; reasons for eating cabbage every day, something I want to remember for later, party ideas, listings of seasonal events, articles on dyslexia, a bit about a new restaurant or a list of top restaurants with patios, the list goes on and on and on. I just keep tucking away information like a packrat. I say to myself that at some time in the future when I have a chance I will read it all.

That time never seems to come…but it will…I'm sure of it…I think.

Now, it's not 1998. I don't have stacks of paper cut out from magazines and newspapers or reams of paper containing information printed from my computer sitting in corners, occupying shelves or pinned to the wall…anymore.

No, it's all invisible to those unaccustomed to my habit.

It's all online {for the most part}. I simply click the star in the corner of my screen and store it away in my bookmarked pages.

It's a great way to be sure you can get back to pages you may want to visit again. So, what's the problem?

Well, I have hundreds and hundreds, maybe thousands of pages bookmarked. I know… I know…ridiculous…over the top….crazy. True, but I go back to this list over and over to grab a bit of info or look up something again or confirm something. I do use this information…eventually.

In fact, during my upcoming vacation, I plan to spend a day just reading through these bookmarked pages and perhaps I'll categorize some and get rid of others and hold on to a few…oh, alright, who am I kidding? I'll keep a good number of these bookmarks and not get through all of them in one day. But hey, it's a start; and I imagine I'll get some ideas and gather some inspiration for writing a few posts too.

I have always been an information hoarder. You should have seen my wedding idea stash. Do you remember Monica's wedding binder from Friends? Well, mine was bigger and more detailed than hers.

I used to keep printed information on all kinds of things. I love reference books and have such books on Shakespeare, Birds of North America, quotes from women, quotes from lawyers, history of the courts, historical courthouses, an old atlas, numerous dictionaries of various types, gardening books, cookbooks, books on London and Paris and Mount Vernon and all kinds of maps, including one of Boise, ID, oddly enough. {Well, you never know….I might need it again sometime…we have been to Boise…14 years ago…and did use this laminated map.}

Of course, one does not need such printed material anymore. It's all at one's fingertips…and can be bookmarked for later uses. And still, I hang on to my books and maps.

There is still something glorious about using an actual map and flipping back to an index to look up an actual page in an actual book. So, I keep these printed materials.

And I'll continue to bookmark my virtual pages, as if I'm folding the corner of the page in my book so it will be waiting for me to return and take up where I last left off.

I am a collector of information. Information empowers me. Information keeps marching forward. Information gives me ideas. Information restores me.

Do you crave information? Do you store it away in your head, on bookshelves, in a virtual file cabinet? What do you do with your information? Over and out…

Anna

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Everything is AWESOME {Sort of}

I want to write. I want to be relevant and heard and make an impact and resonate with my readers. But I don't think I am.

When I started doing this writing online thing I had no idea all the thoughts and feelings and secrets I would share with my readers. Four years ago, I had no idea the emotional toll this would take on me or how it would drive me to keep delving deep inside and stringing words together.

I have had some limited success landing some writing jobs, a few speaking gigs,  some panel appearances and my readership continues to increase, but not enough for the "pros" to say I have broken through. 

Of course, if I followed the advice of the "pros" I would have quit writing and posting a long time ago. Fortunately or unfortunately, as the case may be, I'm kind of a stubborn ass and I don't quit something I believe in and love just because I am failing miserably.

I say I am failing because my growth has been incremental in comparison to other successful blogs; the readers rarely comment or respond to my words and I make absolutely no money from my endeavors. It's a pretty pitiful picture, isn't it?

So, why don't I just abandon the site and cut my losses and watch some TV, clean my house more often and get through the stack of books and magazines occupying my nightstand instead of toiling away into the night writing immaterial, mediocre articles that are read by some, but quickly forgotten?

Well, it's complicated. I have often held counsel with myself to discuss this very point.

I have not quit because I like my writing {but I realize I might be alone in this}. I think I add something to the conversation. I think that sometimes I say things that others dare not agree with or speak up about. I think that perhaps I can reach someone in a similar situation as I have found myself in or touch someone's soul or offer hope to someone who may think she or he is alone, but is not. I think that sometimes I inform or bring together or offer food for thought or maybe make someone laugh or cry or both.

And yet, other times I think that I am a fool; a fool for thinking I can write or offer anything to anyone or make any kind of difference. Sometimes, I think I am a fool for exposing my thoughts and emotions and ideas for nothing in return.

While I am excited to have made it through four years of authoring this blog, I'm not sure whether I'm the winner or the loser in this scenario.

I have taken many risks with this blog and my writing over the past four years. I have not been afraid to take on the minority view or share my thoughts on controversial issues or strip away all and bare my heart and soul. I have been truthful and always written from my heart. And I am proud of those things.

I begin Year 5 with some trepidation, as always, as I try to figure out "my why." And yet, that is not entirely accurate. I know my why. I write because I have something to say.

So, really, what I am always trying to decipher is whether anyone cares about what I have to say; does it matter; does it have an impact on anything or anyone?

In the last 1460 days, I have published 785 posts, that's a lot of words. With each new year, the material changes and with it the style and ease of writing. Hopefully, that is a good thing for my readers.

I continue to struggle with how to reach my readers and get them to engage with me. This is not something I do well.

I live much of my life inside my head, working from home, with few friends or social engagements, which perhaps explains my inability to truly reach my readers, as other writers do, despite pouring out my heart and soul.

So, Year 5 I want to simply Be Amazing {as my sweater indicates}. I want to continue to like what I write. I want to continue to work on my book {because I have a story to tell}. I want to continue to share my heart. And I want to be OK with whether anyone else cares or not.

It is my plan to just go along belting out that "Everything is Awesome!" and believe it…because it can be. And maybe one day, maybe even one day in Year 5, my words will really resonate with readers.

I am so appreciative to the number of faithful readers who do open up each post and read week after week and who do like posts and make comments and having been doing so over the past 1460 days. Thank you! Over and out…

Anna

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Random Tidbits: Completely Unrelated, Useful/Interesting/Semi-Important/You Fill-in-the-Blank Information

You know when you're driving along and your kid pipes up and says something like, "Mom, whatever happened to that stick that I picked up last summer when we were walking around that lake?" and then a few minutes later says, "For my next birthday {which is something like 8 months away, generally}, can I have a birthday cake that has Transformers, Mickey Mouse and Word Girl on it?" And the whole time you're thinking I have no idea and where are these random thoughts coming from.

Well, that's what this post is like.

I've had very few minutes to write lately, but I have a number of random tidbits knocking around in my head. It happens frequently that I have a random thought, save a clipping or jot down an idea that doesn't warrant an entire post, but is still worth mentioning. Sometimes I let them linger until I might have enough to weave the tidbits into something more, but often they simply unravel and these loose ends rot away tucked in a file or pasted on a "sticky note" on my computer desktop or randomly written in a notebook.

So, I decided I'd piece together a quick, unconnected run-down of these various bits of information; some tips, some interesting points, some important notes, some simple observations.

1. Tightening the Belt. For a while I had an internal struggle with trying to figure out whether the strap should be locked or left loose or did it even matter. Booster seats. There's just not the plethora of information about these "tween" seats; that is, "in between" 5 point harnesses and a seat belt without a special seat. I know some parents just leave it loose. I always tighten the seat belt strap.
   1. For one thing, Darling 2 is apt to fall asleep in a moving vehicle and slump forward or sideways. If the belt is loose, he could slip right out of the seat or be injured if the belt snapped tight in an accident or sudden stop.
   2. I dug around online and surprisingly didn't find any definitive answers. So, I asked a resident expert; whom I happened to run into at my Caribou Coffee. She said either way is fine. If you have a sleeper or wiggler then it's best to lock the belt. But if your child is older and is not prone to moving around and getting out of the belt, then loose is fine.
   3. So, there you have it. I still tighten out of habit and because Darling 2 still likes to fall asleep in the car, but Darling 1 likes to remind me that he doesn't have to be locked in now that we know the answer to this question.
2. Mythbusters – Distracted Driving. Do you know about Mythbusters? It's a fun program that we found on Netflix over Winter Break. They take various statements or "facts" and put them to the test. On one program they ran their own test to see whether talking on the phone while driving is as dangerous as driving drunk, as some studies have reported.
   1. Now they weren't legally drunk, but they were as close to it as possible; with police officers overseeing the experiment.
   2. And they weren't recklessly driving around on the roads with other drivers. They were on a driving course with an instructor.
   3. But the tests and testers were serious and the drivers were blown away by how difficult it was to stay on task and not break laws by missing signs, weaving, etc. while talking on the phone and after a few drinks.
   4. Their conclusion was that it is not a myth. Texting/talking on the phone is just as dangerous as driving drunk (or almost drunk), and they did indeed feel out of control {and it's rare that they don't bust the myth}. There you have it. So, Phone Down; Eyes Up! {TAKE MY CHALLENGE!}
3. Teachers Packing Heat. Some teachers may have decided to take matters into their own hands when it comes to "securing" their classrooms.
   1. In the weeks following the Sandy Hook Elementary shooting, according to MotherJones.com, about 600 teachers in some 15 states have signed up for a free firearms training program offered by Buckeye Firearms Association.
   2. MotherJones.com noted that there are only three states in the U.S. that allow concealed weapons in schools: Utah, Kansas and Mississippi.
   3. Now, 600 is a very tiny percentage of the number of teachers in our country, but it's an interesting note.
   4. I'd be curious to know which 15 states those teachers come from; and how many of those 600 are male and how many are female.
   5. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want my kids' teachers packing heat in class.
   6. And on a lighter note, I just pictured Darling 1's amazingly patient, kind and loving kindergarten teacher from last year, with a gun strapped to her hip; now that puts class rules in a very different light.
4. Boo Indeed! Sometimes you miss the ugly, prickly weed when looking for the "Green."
   1. I found a write up for a product called, Bambooee, in MN Parent under Hot Stuff/Go Green. It says this about the products on this page, "Ta-ta, toxins! These products eschew chemicals and/or promote reuse!"
   2. So, the Bambooee is apparently an earth-friendly, sustainable, reusable paper towel. The packaging in the photo says, "Reusable Washable Bleachable." BLEACHABLE? Earth-friendly? No Chemicals? Hmmmm.
   3. Sorry, but why would someone who is choosing to use this product; to be earth friendly, with sustainable, organic products want to or choose to use bleach on this natural, organic, sustainable product?
   4. Bleach is a toxic, harmful chemical, and if you introduce it to your natural, organic, sustainable, bamboo towel, then you're missing the point. I have a better product for you anyway...talk to me {cough, Norwex, cough}
5. Check Your Sources. OK, I am going to expand on this one in another post, but this issue warrants a quick mention here too.
   1. Please check the accuracy and the source of the information you post, Like and share on social media sites. I have noticed an increase in false information and misattributed, made up quotes zipping around on Facebook lately. It's a good rule of thumb to do a quick search to ensure that you are passing good and true information, before you click it out to your hundreds of friends and/or fans.
6. Loose Lips Sink Ships. And along those same lines, not every conversation or thought or situation should be retold or discussed or mentioned on social media sites.
   1. Some things should be left to the imagination; some things should remain confidential; and sometimes "it just wouldn't be prudent" to post every last detail.
   2. So, let your gut instinct be your gauge, but if your gut tells you everything is fair game; then, let's say,
      1. if it's about someone else, especially if you are in any way related or work together;
      2. if it's not nice or puts that person in a bad light;
      3. if there is a contract of any kind involved;
      4. if it sounds like it could be from a red neck reality show
   3. don't post it at all. Instead, call your mom, your spouse, your sibling or best friend and get it off your chest by sharing it with one person rather the 348 of your closest FB friends.

Over and out....

Anna

 

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Curb Appeal: Sometimes Things in Life are Free

Free Stuff

"??Lamb Meat?? We have some lamb meat that we would like to give away, it has been in our deep freezer. There is nothing wrong with it, my family just don't eat it. We have Lamb roast, lamb stew meat, and a leg of lamb. Thanks for looking!"

    ~from a Craigslist posting under Free Stuff

Uh huh.....I don't know about you, but lamb meat from someone's freezer is NOT something I'd accept from a stranger, free or not.

But hold the phone; if you live in a city and you aren't checking this heading on your local Craigslist site before you head out the store, then you're selling yourself short.

At first, it was amusing to see what people were posting; the frozen lamb meat??, a sprinkler that kind of works, a couple of hens and some roosters, Depends adult diapers, but then I started really looking at the postings and for one whole weekend we monitored the "Free Stuff."

The Haul

Here's what we got....for free: a solid oak dining table, a slightly nicked and scratched Ethan Allen shelving unit, a three tiered wall shelf, a wicker chair {I'm a sucker for wicker}; art paper, crayons and chalk (for the kids), a 2 drawer file cabinet and a small shelving unit for closet organization, or office supplies, in my case, and big camping tent.

There were some cool things we weren't quick enough on the draw to get too. And there were things we just didn't need, but that would have been fabulous in someone's home.

Often all these items need are a good scrubbing and perhaps a coat of paint or varnish and sometimes, they are in perfect condition; like the dining table we got.

The Ethan Allen piece can be seen in the photo above. I cleaned it, filled in a few scratches with wood fill and then painted it yellow. I pulled together an ensemble of items from various rooms in our home to make this inviting area in our bedroom, without spending anything.

Before we got this round dining table, we had always had a rectangle table. This table is much smaller than our old one, but the change in shape seems to have changed our meal time atmosphere. For some reason, this smaller, round table is creating more unity and better conversations to our mealtime and work/homework time in the evenings.

I haven't found a place for my wicker chair or wall shelf yet, but I will. And I'll be watching the Free Stuff listings too. I may never buy another piece of wood furniture again.

Items to Skip Over

There are items I would avoid, besides the frozen lamb meat. I would never get a mattress/box springs, linens or luggage from Craigslist. I would be concerned about bed bugs, etc. Unless, you know how to re-upholster, I wouldn't choose the free couches and chairs, etc. either, but there could be some exceptions. I would steer clear of any food listings, formula listings or anything with an expiration date. And one should NEVER pick up for free (or buy) a used car seat or car seat base for safety reasons.

The Scoop

The thing about Craigslist is that you just never know what you're going to find. So, check it out, have fun, be creative and use your head when it comes to what you get and where you go to get it, but don't think about it for too long, because if it's fantastic and free, it won't be on the curb for long. Over and out...

Anna

Vote Smart: Get the 411 Before You Go to the Polls

Campaign Season

Vote No; Vote Yes; Vote this; Vote that. It can get confusing with all the yard signs, Facebook posts and ads online and on TV and radio. To me, the most important thing is that people do vote, regardless of how they vote.

At this time of year, everyone complains about some particular candidate or a whole party's views; and everyone becomes a political expert full of world-changing opinions, but they do vote and where are they getting their information?

Voter ID

There are those who complain and rant and say how they would do it, but aren't even registered to vote and don't intend to ever set foot in a voting booth. To those people, I say that every vote can make a difference, but if they refuse to vote, then hold your tongues because you don't get an opinion involving candidates, policies or parties.

To those who do vote and do it quietly without sounding great bugles announcing who and why and wherefore, I admire you; for politics is a personal business, in my opinion. Now, that isn't to say that these people can't firmly stand up for what they believe is right by volunteering to aid a candidate's campaign or taking a firm position if asked about a particular issue or candidate. These people do these things, but not with great fanfare.

Then, there are those who must tell every friend on Facebook, every neighbor, co-worker, family member and even strangers their strong political beliefs. These people often push their views on others and seem to want to offend others in order to start a debate; the more public the better for these people. Generally, it's these people that need a stage for every aspect of life though, not just during the politically charged months of the year. These people I don't understand, and I try to avoid them at all costs. But they do vote, and for that, I respect them.

Hitting Home with the Voter

Sometimes, politics hits home and can affect families. For instance, many voters across the country will consider measures that deal with the definition of marriage, school referendums, taxes, etc .

Yesterday, I got an email from a group that supports the Minnesota Zoo, encouraging its members to be sure to ask their candidates if they support the Zoo, considering that a very small, but vital part of their budget comes from the state's budget. I have never considered the Zoo when I vote, but I will this year thanks to the email.

Voter Education

So, if you are going to vote, and I sincerely hope you do vote, then you do need to be sure you understand the issues and what each of your candidates stand for in this race; one way or another the winner of these races will impact your life.

For unbiased, unabashed candidate info go to Project Vote Smart. This non-profit, non-partisan organization gives you the information you need about each candidate and ballot measure in your voting precinct.

If your head is spinning from all the speeches, debates and ads, and you just want the facts, please, then go to FactCheck.org. This non-profit group is busy fact-checking and debunking ads, speeches, quotes, articles, etc. so that you can sleep easy and be clear about the issues and the candidates spinning them before you vote.

And if you just need to know exactly how your candidates stand on the issues and will most likely vote while in office/support as a local/state/federal official, then check On the Issues. Here you will find very succinct listings of where your guy or gal sits on a long list of important issues.

The Scoop

During the next month or so, there will be no escaping politics. It has invaded yards, voicemails, radio, TV, billboards, magazines, newspapers and stores...even children's stores. This photo was taken in a Toys R Us. You can try to maneuver the claw to grab and win a Mitt Romney doll or Barack Obama pillow head. I bet all the kids try for those over the veggie heads, angry birds and teddy bears. Over and out...

Anna

The Final Act: Custom Made Funerals

Loss

When you lose someone you love are there ever any words anyone can ever say that make you feel better? I don't think so. I think it's just something you have to work out in your own head and heart.

This is one instance when I'm at a loss for words. I feel awkward and inadequate when it comes to saying the "right thing" to someone mourning the death of a loved one.

When a person has been suffering or has lived a long, good life; the loss is bittersweet. There is pain and sadness knowing that you won't be seeing, talking with, living life with this special person for the rest of your life, but there is also a peace of mind, a relief that the person you love is no longer hurting.

For me, that pain trumps the peace for the first few days after the death of a loved one and nothing anyone says to me changes how I feel or how I see things.

This past weekend, my sister-in-law lost her mom to a vicious, hard-fought battle with cancer. There are no words for me to say to her. My heart weeps for her; the pain of losing one's mother is too great to be soothed by words. But even through her own pain and loss, my steadfast, faithful, unselfish sister-in-law is grateful that her mother has now been made whole again and is no longer in pain.

I've written much about death since August of 2011. Our family has experienced a lot of loss this past year. And while I've written about wills and trusts, estate planning, digital legacies and more over the years, I have not discussed funeral planning.

Making Your Wishes Known

I started thinking more about end-of-life provisions after a conversation with a friend. She was telling me how thankful she is that her dad has taken care of all of his funeral provisions and estate planning and took the time to discuss it with her. When the time comes, she and her siblings won't have to worry about figuring out the final arrangements while dealing with their grief and loss.

So, I did a little research, and what I found warmed the heart of this control freak.

I found a way to reach out beyond the hereafter and dictate my last plans; a website that allows me to dictate just about every detail of what happens with my remains and lets me set out exactly what I want said, sung, played, read and done at the service, celebration or memorial of my choosing. I can even write my obituary and upload photos I want my family to use at the service, with the obit, etc. and design my own headstone, if so desired.

My Wonderful Life allows a person to leave letters to loved ones to be received after the person is deceased; list and explain bequeaths; make notes about where important information is located, etc. A person can designate 1 to 6 "angels" to be the "administrators" of the person's "Book" once the person is gone.

The site is password protected and secured with SSL (Secured Sockets Layer) and personal information is encrypted in their database. The information can be accessed by the person with the account at any time to add or change information or the designated angels, upon the death of the account holder.

I love this idea. My Wonderful Life gives each person a chance to express feelings regarding family, death and funerals, etc. without having to discuss this often uncomfortable subject with family and/or friends. Whether someone is 29, 86, 47 or 66, completely healthy, very ill or simply getting on in years, this site allows a person to express thoughts and feelings about death, dying and after death and set out his or her affairs.

The Scoop

Now, to be clear, this site is not meant to replace wills or other legal documents or meeting with an attorney to be sure your affairs are in order, in the legal sense. This website simply allows for more articulation of preferences and feelings and explanations, if needed.

The idea for this website was born from the death of the co-founder's spouse and the need for people to have a place to make these decisions about seemingly mundane aspects of death and the services that followed in addition to leaving notes about various items, relationships, legacies, etc.

So, if you're like my parents who have very definite ideas about how they would like their untraditional send offs to go, this just might be the place for you. Of course, talking to your family members about your wishes, even if you use this website, is still a good idea. Check it out for yourself; it's free to register: www.mywonderfullife.com. Over and out...

Anna

Modern House Call: A Virtual Visit to the Doctor

Medical History

I have a history of allergies; allergies to dust, mold, pollen, etc. I can't really remove these things from my life; unless I went to live in a bubble. And sometimes a quiet, clean, allergen free bubble sounds pretty good, especially at this time of year.

Historically, April is a rough month for me. Here in MN, the temps are up and down; then it's wet; and then it's dry; then it's windy, and on and on. All of these weather conditions make for a sneezy, snotty, achy, fuzzy, bleary-eyed me.

I really hate to go to the doctor's office, but I've had enough sinus infections in my time to know when it's time to get the big guns to fight this pressurized invasion in my head. Part of the issue is that I can never get into to see "my" doctor. In fact, I haven't seen "my" doctor since 2006. Instead, I've seen others in her clinic or gone to urgent care clinics covered by my insurance for a quick exam and prescription.

Virtual Office Visit    

Well, a month or so ago, while listening to music on Pandora I heard an ad for a virtual medical clinic. I was only vaguely tuned in since I don't really listen to advertisements, but I did wonder about it and made a mental note to look it up sometime.

Then, just a few weeks ago, a friend was explaining how she had been sick right before leaving on a business trip. She didn't have time for a doctor visit, but thought she needed some antibiotics for a sinus infection. So, my friend went to the online medical clinic, answered a series of questions and got the prescription she needed to feel better.

So, last night as I sat blowing my nose, holding my head and feeling lousy from the pressure in my ears and sinus cavities as I have for the last week or so, I remembered this virtual clinic. And I decided I'd give it a try.

After answering a series of general health and medical history questions and specific questions regarding symptoms, completing forms for payment, insurance information and picking my preferred pharmacy, my file was submitted to a nurse practitioner.

Less than 30 minutes later, I received a text and email that my treatment plan was available at the site. My prescription had been sent to the pharmacy and she also suggested other treatments such as steam, saline sprays, etc for the pressure and pain in my head.

There was even a photo and name of the nurse practitioner helping me; complete with a get well soon note and instruction to call the number provided if I'm not better in 3 to 5 days. It was 11:30 on a Sunday night, and I had "been to the doctor" and was about to get started on antibiotics.

Online Medical Options

The service I used was Virtuwell by HealthPartners, a MN based not-for-profit HMO. Virtuwell currently serves residents of MN and WI, as well as those who are traveling in those states.

There is another similar service here in MN called Zipnosis. Zipnosis is a part of Fairview Medical Services. Both Virtuwell and Zipnosis were created with many patient safeguards in place, but they are constantly re-evaluating and making changes as necessary, meeting as often as once a week to discuss cases and issues that have arisen through the week; monitoring clinician and patient practices, etc.

For those in MN, here are a few comparisons:

• Virtuwell costs $40 per "visit" and accepts insurance, but you don't have to have insurance to use this system.
• Zipnosis $25 per "visit", but doesn't accept insurance.
• Both Virtuwell and Zipnosis are available 24 hours per day, 365 days a year
• Zipnosis serves MN residents only.
• Both have treatment plans, which may include antibiotics, to you within 30 minutes
• Both provide follow-up care/information if treatment plan doesn't work
• Virtuwell treats patients 2 years and up
• Zipnosis treats patients 13 years and up
• Both have limited services as to what types of maladies they will treat.
  • Anything other than routine infections and easily diagnosed and treated illnesses, will be referred to see a doctor immediately
• Both allow the patient to upload an image of his or her condition, if a visual is necessary. {For skin issues, etc.}
• Virtuwell is staffed by nurse practitioners
• Zipnosis is staffed by physician assistants

There are a few other websites that charge a yearly fee, plus a fee for each call or a flat fee per visit to connect to a doctor for a video or phone consultation and diagnosis for sick patients outside of MN and WI. If you aren't in MN, check out these online medical clinics:

• Ringadoc; and
• MD Live Care

The Scoop

These services save time, money and energy, allowing a person with or without insurance to get treated for common infections from any location whether work, home or in the middle of a hectic schedule at any time of day or night at an affordable flat fee.

There is also room for misdiagnosis and/or misuse of this virtual medical clinic model. Of course, there is always a chance of misdiagnosis and abuse of the system {someone trying to acquire prescriptions for the wrong reasons} should someone go to a clinic and physically see a doctor, as well.

I think that each person must use his or her 6^th sense about whether he or she is really ill with odd, inconsistent or serious symptoms and decide whether to go to their doctor, urgent care or an ER. If not, then this convenient, highly monitored system is probably a good idea for your run-of-the-mill, irritating infections. But I don't think I'll use it for my kids unless it's middle of the night, raging ear infection, etc.

Have you used these services? What's your take on them? Over and out...

Anna

 

 

A Pinterest{ing} Question: Is it Safe to Pin?

Failing to See the Forest for the Trees

A few weeks ago, we tried one of those do-it-yourself yogurt bars where you choose from 16 some odd flavors of yogurt and then pile on the toppings. You can go crazy or keep it modest. I let the boys choose their flavors and toppings with minimal help from me, allowing them to create their own unique treat. They actually kept it pretty respectable with a balance of fruit and candy.

On the way out the door, Darling 1 dropped his cup, spilling some of the kiwi fruit, gummy bears and brownie chunks out on the sidewalk. He panicked and began to go into hysterics, but I scooped it up and assured him that I had saved most of his delicious concoction. Once seated and chowing down on his frozen yogurt treat, he forgot about those lost gummy bears; and despite this small hiccup and near meltdown, he enjoyed his very distinctive "fro-yo" creation.

Sometimes we lack vision and can't see past a small stone in the path that we mistaken for a giant boulder. When that happens it takes insight from others to realize it's not really such a big deal.

Jumping the Gun

About a month ago, a woman wrote a post explaining her tearful decision to close her Pinterest account over fear of lawsuits regarding the photo links she "pinned" on this social media platform. After reading the Pinterest Terms of Use and considering copyright laws she basically panicked, pulled her boards down and spread her paranoid post across the blogosphere. I've been ruminating on this issue since reading the article. And finally, I have a chance to write about it.

For those who don't know, Pinterest is a relatively new social media platform where users can create virtual bulletin boards with different themes. Each time a user places a photo link on a board, it's called "a pin." Many websites have added buttons titled "Pin This" or other similar statements to encourage readers to post the link with a photo to their Pinterest boards.

I do have a Pinterest account, but I admit that I have barely used it and I'm certainly no expert on Pinterest, but my opinion is that this woman made a mountain out of a molehill. There are two issues to address: 1) Terms of Use; and 2) copyright laws. Neither of these issues are unique to Pinterest.

Terms of Use

The woman who sadly left Pinterest was apparently shocked to find that Pinterest claimed indemnity when it came to copyright issues, including attorney fees. Well, let me tell you that all online platforms who have covered all their bases, dotted every i and crossed every t is going to place all the blame squarely on your shoulders and leave your mess in your lap should you violate someone's copyright. And why shouldn't they?

After all, it's not Typepad's {my blog host} responsibility to make sure that I don't infringe on anyone's copyright, etc. They are merely the paid host of thousands of blogs. They are not the regulators of content, nor the owners of any of the content contained within each blog. Just as it is not Pinterest's obligation to ensure that everyone being pinned is alright with this. So, any legal actions, including any costs incurred, are the user's liability not the platform's problem.

This should not have been a shock to this woman. This is standard language in a Terms of Use policy. I would be shocked if the Terms of Use didn't contain these provisions. There's no reason to quit Pinterest because of this standard and fair language.

Copyrighted Material

As with any social media platform, all users should have at the very least a vague understanding of copyright laws in order to protect their own works and protect themselves from getting in trouble if using someone else's original work. I think, in general, misunderstandings about what constitutes copyrighted material and what is an infringement of such copyright abound in the world of social media.

It's actually quite easy to infringe on someone's copyrighted material if you're pinning content on Pinterest, posting photos that you didn't take or writing articles with liberal use of other's written words without permission from the copyright owner.

Here are a few of the basic concepts:

• What type of material is protected by copyright? {the short answer}
  • Copyright protects original works of authorship including literary, musicals. Dramatic and artistic works.
  • Copyright does not include ideas, systems, facts or methods of operation.
• What constitutes copyright infringement?
  • In general terms, a copyright is infringed when a person makes a derivative work, reproduces, performs, publicly displays or distributes copyrighted material without the permission from the copyright owner.
• What is fair use?
  • Fair use is a doctrine that allows for limited use of copyrighted materials without first acquiring permission from the copyright owner.
  • Under fair use, copyrighted material may be used for news reporting, criticism, commentary, educational uses, research and the like.
  • In determining whether fair use applies, a court will look at 4 factors;
    • Purpose and character of the use;
    • Nature of the original; material made for commercial use is less protected;
    • Amount and substance of original used; and
    • Effect that the use has had on the market of the original material.

Pinning without Permission

While "pinning" a photo that acts as a link to the original source, may or may not be considered copyright infringement {the courts haven't considered this specific issue yet}, most website owners are not going to be upset by this link. The pinning to a board in Pinterest will likely cause increased traffic to the original source's site, which for most will be considered a positive effect.

One exception might be photographers who are showcasing photos of clients or selling their art on their sites. These sites are often protected by passwords and/or have water marks on photos and provide language about the use of their photos.

However, should your "pin" not link the material to the original source, a problem could arise. And yet, most likely the first course of action will not be to file a lawsuit. Most of these issues can easily be corrected by contacting the person who is infringing on another's copyright and demand that the offending person take down copyrighted material immediately.

If that doesn't do the trick, a formal cease and desist letter would follow. And then, if there is still infringement or if there is a gross infringement or habitual infringement, a petition would most likely be filed in federal court.

The Scoop

Few with a heavy online presence haven't had to send a demand to take down a page or post or photo. It happens often, whether on purpose or in ignorance. I don't mean to say it isn't a big deal; it is. But it's usually something that can easily be dealt with without filing a lawsuit.

So, should you close up shop at Facebook, Twitter, your blog, Pinterest, et al? I don't think so. But I do think you should know what the Terms of Use that you have agreed to say and understand the basics of copyright law. When in doubt about whether what you're "taking" from another constitutes copyright infringement be sure to look it up; you can find anything online. Oh, and I'm fine with you "pinning" this on Pinterest, sharing it on Facebook or Retweeting it on Twitter Over and out....

Anna

Something Different: IDEA Part C Updates to Take Effect

Gawking Strangers

The stares. I'm still not used to the stares. And it's not kids; it's adults; it's other parents. We were surprised by this part of it. I suppose we shouldn't have been though. Three weeks ago, Darling 1 got two casts from below his knees down to his toes. He isn't hurt; he isn't in pain. He is a toewalker and has been since he began walking at 10 months.

I've been working on treatment for this since that time. Finally, he's getting treatment. He's growing new muscle in his calves that will give him more range of motion. We have a remedy. Every Tuesday he gets new casts, slowly, but surely changing the angle of his foot.

The Casts

The new casts each week is the fun part of this process. He is being very brave, and we are very proud of him. He has had only a few melt-downs about not being able to wiggle his toes or being itchy, etc. But he knows what the casts are doing, and he wants to be able to walk flat-footed. So, he endures.

His friends, classmates and teachers have been wonderful about it. They love to see what colors and designs will show up each Wednesday. They are totally accepting of his new look. Darling 1 gets around perfectly fine; he just can't run, but he can walk really fast.

Mind Your Own Beeswax

The adults we come in contact with, or merely pass by, are the ones who stare and ask questions; questions that make Darling 1 cast a fixed gaze to the ground. The stares have gotten to me. I stare back. I answer the probing questions from strangers with terse, vague answers. Darling 1 hasn't noticed that anyone is rubber-necking as they drive by as he happily walks along next to me on our way home from school or as we amble into the store from a parking lot or as he easily makes his way up, over, under and through the playground equipment at the park or while we wait to be called back for our appointment at Children's Hospital. Thank God.

I know these strangers don't mean any harm; they don't mean to be rude; they're simply curious. "Two casts?" "Wow, two broken legs?" "Oh, that must hurt?" "What did you do?" Well, when you're 5 years old and just want to fit in and you see the differences, those questions can be hurtful and perplexing.

I won't pretend to know all the heartbreak, the difficulties or the joys and the pride of raising a child with extreme disabilities. I'm sure they are many. But I now have a new appreciation for the outward appearance of something different from others, i.e. helmets, leg braces, etc.

IDEA Part C

If your young child has developmental delays or disabilities, you should be aware that on Friday, October 28, 2011, new, updated Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) Part C regulations will take effect. IDEA Part C applies to the youngest of those at risk; birth to 2 years. Part C has been around since 1986, but has not been fully updated since 1999 (there was a statutory update in 2004).

Well, a lot has changed in our world since 1999. Check for specific information or topics in this side-by-side comparison of new and old text. There is a lot of text (over 900 pages); so, I suggest looking up the subject you are interested in and viewing those parts, as opposed to reading through all the regulations.

There are agencies trying to wade through these new texts and get summaries and outlines out. Here are a few websites to watch for more information: National Dissemination Center for Children with Disabilities (NICHCY), idea Partnership and the U.S. Department of Education.

IDEA aides over 340,000 children and infants. This federal grant program provides over 400 million dollars to State run IDEA programs. This program assists States in facilitating early intervention programs for infants and toddlers with disabilities and developmental delays. The objective is to prepare as many of these kids as possible for preschool and kindergarten to ensure a greater rate of educational success for these high needs kids.

The Scoop

If your child falls into these categories be sure to monitor the changes on the sites listed above. I also don't pretend to know much about the laws governing special needs and disabilities, etc., but the sites listed above specialize in these areas. And if your child does not fall into these categories, remember... please don't stare when you see a child who is different in some way. Over and out...

Anna

Hunger Pangs: Finding Ways to Help from Around the Globe

Empty Cabinets and Empty Pockets

There have been a few times in my life when I was close to being without food in my cupboards and no money with which to buy food. One time was during law school. It was the very end of the fall semester of my second year. I lived from loan to loan from semester to semester through law school.

That semester I must have spent more or spent it too soon. I don't remember why exactly I was in that position, but I was. My parents also helped me out with a monthly amount, but I must have already spent that too, and I couldn't bring myself to ask for more. All I had to do was make it through finals and then my family would be coming to visit me and that meant my parents would be paying for and cooking meals.

I recall feeling hungry. I recall feeling sorry for myself. I recall looking at mostly empty cabinets and trying to pull together enough for a meal. I recall my mom sending me a care package and hoping and praying there was money or food in the box, but there wasn't. There were lovely things to lift my spirits, make me smile and encourage me with my studying, but no food or money with which to buy the needed food.

All the while, I was studying nonstop for finals. This couldn't have been good for my brain or my grades, trying to absorb information without proper nutrition, but somehow I made it through those finals. I had enough to eat so that I did not truly starve or become malnourished. And I had only myself to worry about. I didn't have a family to think of or share my meager meals with; it was just me. But I certainly felt tinges of despair over not having enough food.

Feeling of Helplessness

Lately, one cannot escape the horrible, maddening, tear-inducing images of women, children and families in Somalia who are quite literally starving and thirsting to death. I almost can't bear to look at those photos or read those articles because it makes me feel so utterly helpless. Those stories make me think of my own family and how I would feel if we were in such a position.

I feel as though my hands and feet are bound and I have been rendered quite defenseless. When the blessed saint-like aid workers can't get to these vulnerable people; when basic human dignities can't reach these desolate people; how can I help them?

I want to stand up and shout, "This should not be!" "This is absurd!" I wonder how people can be so cruel; so despicable; so evil. And I know I'm seeing the devil himself when such horrors take place. But how can I stop this insanity? How can I help these people whose only goal in life at this moment is to survive another wretched day?

Helping the Horn of Africa

I read an article by Josette Sheeran, the Executive Director of the United Nations' World Food Programme (WFP), in which she shares ways that each of us can help out in little ways that can make a big impact all together. WFP provides food assistance to more than 105 million people in 75 countries.

These are the suggestions as outlined on their website:

Horn of Africa: 10 Ways You Can Help

1. Make an online donation;
2. Donate by text message;
3. Take the quiz and give a child a warm meal provided for by an anonymous donor; then challenge your friends to do the same;
4. Share a video;
5. Stay current by watching or reading the latest news regarding this crisis;
6. Get Social by following on Facebook, Twitter and YouTube;
7. Grab a banner;
8. Get ads published by asking your local newspaper(s) to publish a print ad on this crisis;
9. Be creative by taking up a collection at school or in the neighborhood, holding a garage sale or bake sale or cutting back on unnecessary items at the grocery store and donating the saved money to this food crisis; and
10. Keep WFP posted on your efforts.

No Satisfaction

I can do many of these things, although I must admit this list doesn't make me feel better about these dire situations. When there are more than 400,000 refugees crowded into a camp in Kenya built for 90,000 displaced persons; when women are beaten and raped along this death march in search of water and food; when robbers take every drop of water from families and children die from dehydration, how I can possibly be satisfied with giving a little money or sharing the information in hopes that others will also donate in some way?

I can't. And I won't be satisfied. I will teach my children about the pain, the suffering, the need, all caused by man's greed, selfishness and cruelty. I will pray. And I will do my part when and where I can whether here in the U.S. or abroad. And I will play the Rice Game to donate a meal and grab a banner and follow and read and share information and more. But I won't be satisfied and I won't forget.

For more information about WFP and ways that you can help, follow the link above or go to www.wfp.org.

The Scoop

Now I am not so naïve to think that lack of food and nutrients is an isolated crisis in some faraway land. The rest of this week I will be talking about resources for families in need of groceries and meals in the U.S. Additionally, as school begins again, families may find themselves in need of free or reduced rate breakfasts and lunches for the first time. I will provide information and resources regarding these issues, as well. The face of poverty is changing.

I know some of you are already making an effort to help get food and clean water to people in need, both here and abroad. What tips or resources or additional information can you add? Thanks for listening. Over and out....

Anna

Coffee with Anna: Week in Review Vlog

Welcome to Motherly Law's first Week in Review vlog. A vlog is a video blog; for those of you not familiar with that term. I'm going to give this a shot for a few weeks and see how it goes.

So, get a cuppa java and sit back and watch.

 

I would love your feedback, but do be kind, please. {Yes, Mom, I know I need a haircut, and I'm getting one today.} Please drop me a line! Thanks for watching. Over and out...

Anna

On Georgia Peaches & Writing

The Truckload Sale

On Thursday, I bought a crate of Georgia peaches from the back of a semi truck parked in a Menard's parking lot. I really love a good peach, but it's incredibly hard to get a really good peach, especially in the state of Minnesota. So, I took a chance, standing in that hot parking lot with my boys staring into a mostly empty, big, gleaming, silver semi trailer, and bought a crate of approximately 55 peaches from a fairly questionable character.

I was worried the peaches wouldn't be tasty; I was worried the peaches wouldn't be juicy; I was worried the peaches wouldn't be fresh; I was worried that I had been ripped off. I needn't have worried. The peaches are quite tasty, juicy and fresh. And we have been eating peaches every day with almost every meal for the last three days and loving it.

Even still, a family of 4 can only eat so many fresh peaches before the peaches aren't so fresh anymore. So, I turned to the Internet, my trusty companion, for some scrumptious fresh peach recipes to help use up these sweet golden orbs before they are mushy, brown lumps.

Message from a Blog

In so doing, I came across a foodie blog, Orangette. I had never read it, nor heard of it before, but the author, Molly Wizenberg, has done quite well with it since writing her first post on July 29, 2004, even landing a book deal in 2008. It's beautifully written with lovely recipes, and I liked the author immediately {maybe it's her Oklahoma roots}.

When I was reading about Molly and Orangette, I felt uplifted; I felt inspired to keep trucking along with my nose to the grindstone, honing and sculpting my own little 17 month old blog. Molly, who originally had wished to write for a food magazine, was found by her book editor and agent and Bon Appétit, only 3 or so years after beginning to blog.

While it's not my goal to write for a food magazine....well, let me rephrase that, I certainly would write for a food magazine if given the chance or new magazine or parent magazine, etc. However, the point is, it happens: a person launches a blog and writes to write and does get noticed...at least some of the time. And that's exactly the message I needed to hear.

Recently, someone said to me, "I wouldn't blog if I didn't make any money from mine." when I said I didn't make anything from Motherly Law. And someone else asked me, "What do you hope to gain from your blogging?" Well, it can be a bit disheartening to ponder these things.

I write to gain experience; I write to have exposure; I write to express myself; I write to inform; and I write so that I may have the opportunity to write for a magazine, a website or other publication one day. And I think that's OK.

The Scoop

Incidentally, I didn't find any peach recipes on Orangette, but I did find a number of recipes in various other spots that I will be trying out in the next week or so, including a tasty Insalata con Peche with prosciutto and the Peach & Biscuit Crostata in my oven right now. Over and out....

Anna

You might also like:

A New Year and A New Set of Goals; Personal and Professional

Motherly Advice: Reaching for the Sun

Work Wanted: Will Write for Money

An Open Door & a New World: Motherly Law's First Anniversary

Baby Steps: Learning to be Patient with Our New Endeavors

The best laid schemes of mice and men, go oft awry.

        ~From the poem, To a Mouse by Robert Burns

 Change is Good

At the end of winter and the beginning of spring this year, along with melting and budding and greening that the changing of the seasons brings, our household was making changes too. Dear Husband, Will, was forced to start looking for a new job; a new career. After a bit of searching, both on the job boards and in the soul, and a whole lot of brainstorming and praying, he decided to make a business plan and start a social media consulting business.

In May of this year, he opened the doors, so to speak, by launching his website for Open Door Consulting, Inc. Each day brings ups and downs in this new endeavor. We are ever hopeful, optimistic and yet realistic too. As with every new business, each step taken is a baby step ...hopefully, a step in the right direction.

We did not plan to open a business. We did not mean to both be self employed, but life happens and we must be resourceful and creative and learn to cope. Little by little, Open Door is gaining momentum.

The Written Word

This week, Will launched Open Door's Blog, The Key Word. His goal is to write interesting, informative, key posts on social media topics that run the gamut from online networking, analytical tools, social media tips in general to specific social media platforms, tricks of the trade, business blogging, Will's own experiences, opinions and practices.

Will intends to post 3 to 5 times per week. And guess what? Yours truly will be helping out by posting once or twice a week over at The Key Word. While these posts will specifically be aimed at businesses using social media, anyone using social media platforms for work or play or a little of both, will likely gain some insight and some know how from these articles.

My first post at The Key Word is up today. So, please go check it out and find out why every business should be have a blog. And feel free to drop Will a line of encouragement over on Open Door's website.

The Scoop

Do you have a business? Do you use social media? Do you hire someone to help with social media? Talk to me, folks. Over and out....

Anna

You might also like:

Blowing Bubbles in the Wind: Giving Ideas a Chance at Life

Twitter 101: Engage, Build Relationships, Reply...

Motherly Advice: Choose Faith

Practice Makes Perfect: Teen Drivers’ Inexperience Can Cost Us All

It Takes a Village

I don't have teens yet, not even by a long shot. And I realize many of my readers don't have teen-aged kids either. So, why should you care about teen drivers and the shocking number of crashes involving these drivers?

Those teens are driving on the same highways that you take on your way to work or to the zoo with your kids in the morning; those teens are driving down the same streets your little ones are riding bikes and trikes and that you are running on; those teens are driving home in the dark on the same roads your family is driving on after having dinner with friends.

We all need to care about teen drivers and whether they are safe, supervised and following the law. Parents of teens should ensure that their teen and his or her friends follow the law regarding when teens are allowed to drive and who and how many can ride with a teen driver.

Open Line of Communication

Parents should talk to their kids, of all ages, about the dangers of distracted driving and instruct their kids that using a cell phone while driving is NEVER acceptable. Parents must remind their kids that it's important to make sure every passenger is buckled up, with a seatbelt, booster seat or car seat. And as always, parents must remember to always be an excellent role model when driving.

My Darling Boys are just as passionate as I am about safe driving. They are just as relentless in their reminders of buckling up and not talking or texting. My almost 5 year old won't even let me eat while I drive. They are this hyper-sensitive about distracted driving because we talk about it often.

There will always be distractions and teen drivers will have to learn to drive under less than perfect conditions, but it's all about gaining experience little by little. That is what the Graduated Driver's Licensing (GDL) programs are all about; allowing for more and more unsupervised driving over time.

The Stats

These statistics are astounding and sad:

12, 479 male drivers and passengers ages 15 to 19 were killed in crashes from 2000 to 2006;

6,579 female drivers and passengers ages 15 to 19 were killed in crashes from 2000 to 2006;

Teen drivers ages 16 to 19 have a fatality rate four times the rate of drivers ages 25 to 69;

Sixteen-year-old drivers have a crash rate three times more than 17-year-olds, 5 times greater than 18-year-olds, and two times that of 85-year-olds;

One in three teens who text say they have done so while driving;

The estimated economic cost of police-reported crashes involving drivers between the ages of 15 and 20 was $40.8 billion in the United States just in 2002;

Crashes involving young drivers claimed the lives of nearly 3,300 other people in 2009 alone; and

The risk of crashing is highest during the first year that teens are eligible to drive.

Source: www.CDC.gov & www.saferoads4teens.org

For every one of these deaths, there are two parents; parents just like you. Let's stop these needless deaths by educating our youngsters and ourselves about the dangers of inexperienced driving and driving with distractions.

Safe Driving Resources

Here are some insightful resources for parents and kids on the topic of safe driving, dangers of distracted driving and teen drivers:

• Safe Roads 4 Teens
• Department of Transportation's Distraction.gov (there are some graphic & convincing videos, but be aware of the graphic nature when viewing with young kids)
• Consumer Reports
• CDC.gov

The Scoop

Have a wonderful, safe weekend. If you are looking for Motherly Advice, it came early this week, and you can find it here: {Special Thursday Edition}. Over and out...

Anna

You might also like:

 Walking a Fine Line: Social Host Laws and Underage Drinking

Challenge Reissued: Simulated Distracted Driving & Teens

Phone Down; Eyes Up: Distracted Driving Statistics Update & Driver Challenge

Why I stopped Watching the News

Bad News

I used to watch the news on TV. Then, I moved on to reading the news online. And then I stopped altogether. I listen to Minnesota Public Radio for local breaking news. I check weather.com for weather updates. I see bits and pieces and links to news in tweets. And I read The Week magazine back to front for news from around the world.

Last night when I was thinking about what I was going to write about this week, I decided to check a national news website for inspiration. I found out that a teenage boy had been lured to a home by other teenagers and viciously murdered in Florida. I learned that a young, female, real estate agent in Iowa was found shot in a model home and later died at the hospital. I read about a mom and her daughter who were found murdered in their apartment in New York. One story always leads to another similarly bloody, terrible story. I saw a headline about a bomb and a mall and a suspect in Colorado, and then I left that site.

I decided that the local news must be better on Easter Sunday. On a local Twin Cities news site, I read about a girl in critical condition who was accidentally shot by her father when his gun jammed while shooting targets and he was attempting to fix it in the home. I found out a woman was sexually assaulted while jogging early Saturday morning in an upscale suburb. And then, I remembered why I stopped reading the news.

Irrational, but Comforting Reasoning

I hate to read these stories of tragedy, picture the evilness unfolding and see the happy, smiling photos of the now murdered, missing or broken. And yet, I read these stories... every single one I see a headline for or hear about and look up online. I read these stories searching for any detail that I can find to set me and my family apart from the victim of the story. I read these stories to know how the person attacked, taken or killed came to be in this situation.

If they live in a different area of the country or live in a bad neighborhood or run with the wrong crowd or are involved in drugs or commit crimes or have relatives who did these things or work in risky industries or this or that then they are not like me and these things won't happen to me. Irrational? Yes, but it gives me a bit of peace while I try to protect my family from the wolves of this world.

And what if they are not unlike me? What if I can relate to these victims? What if the crime occurred too close for comfort or happened to a mom, a dad, a kid or a whole family? Then, I scour the article for details spelling out exactly how this crime occurred so that I can try to ensure I'm never in this situation or so that I can warn my kids to never do this or always do that.

An Intense Imagination

These stories fuel my imagination, are forever burned into my mind's eye and tug at my heartstrings. Until I became a mom, I could handle it better. It always bothered me, but there were years that I watched all the crime shows and TV news magazine shows, like Dateline and 48 Hours. I was consumed by these issues during law school years and when I worked in the courts, but often it was not hard to differentiate myself from the persons involved in these violent crimes.

I tend to be an empathetic, passionate, analytical person and these traits have only become sharper with the births of my Darling Boys. If you aren't an intense, passionate, type-A personality you're probably shaking your head, perplexed by my paranoia, or laughing at my methods; and that's OK. As the saying goes, to each his own. But if you are like me, you know what I write of.

The Scoop

I send up prayers of sadness and hope for the aforementioned people and their families. I send up prayers questioning why these horrible things must happen. I send up prayers of thankfulness that my family has safely made it through another week.

For now, I'm going to stick with MPR and The Week for my news and shield myself from these horrendous stories. Am I alone in these thoughts and feelings; or can you relate? This week's schedule is crazy for our household. So, it's going to be a week of variety on Motherly Law. Over and out...

Anna

You might also like:

The Cautious Approach to Life: Tips for Teaching Your Kids Gun Safety

When Staying Isn’t an Option: Tips for Identifying an Abuser and Leaving an Abusive Relationship

There but for the Grace of God, Go I: Tips and Websites for Keeping Your Child Safe In and Around Vehicles

Ultimate Blog Party 2011: 2nd Annual BYOB {Bring Your Own Blog} Party at the Motherly Law Domain

Welcome to my blog, Motherly Law! I'm so glad to have you here. I'm a mom and an attorney, and I write about legal issues that affect families and offer tips and resources that pertain to those issues. On Fridays, I provide a bit of Motherly Advice; and when I'm inspired to write something totally unrelated to law, I do that too.

I've come a long way since Ultimate Blog Party 2010. Back then, I had just launched my blogging career and had about 12 posts under my belt. That seems like eons ago. I now post just about every day, actively participate in Twitter and Facebook, have attended BlogHer 10, Minnesota Blogger Conference and Blissdom 11 and have actually met many of my online friends!

I accidentally stumbled across the hashtag for Ultimate Blog Party last year and followed it back to www.5MinutesforMom.com. I quickly wrote a post, linked up and started party hopping. This year, I had it on my calendar. I have been monitoring the hashtag to ensure I don't miss out on any important #UBP11 information.

And now, it's here. So, I straightened up my site, put some shinier, prettier Facebook and Twitter buttons up, cleaned out the cobwebs {it is the World Wide Web, right}, and made cookies for the party.

Now here's the thing about the cookies. I was going to make something from scratch. I really was, but then time got away from me. I got busy and ran out of time. So, these cookies are slice and bake chocolate chip, but they're still yummy...and straight out of the oven.

I'm reading an advance copy of Becky Beaupre Gillespie's and Hollee Schwartz Temple's Good Enough is the New Perfect, and I have decided I fall in the "Good Enoughs" category; and I'm OK with that. So, no homemade cookies, but they're warm and freshly-baked. So, enjoy a few with a big glass of ice-cold milk or hot coffee and keep reading!

What I love about social media is the having the opportunity to meet and connect with so many wonderful, inspiring people across the country. I love hearing from readers that I have informed, entertained or made some kind of impact through a post. And I love to write!

I've covered distracted driving, estate planning, bike helmets, stalking, food regulations, toy regulations, pool safety, bullying, family law, car seats, gun laws and numerous other subjects. In the near future, I plan on tackling education, vaccines, child care, adoption, etc.

So, click on a few of the linked posts or go through the archives, but take your time, relax and enjoy. I'm from Texas, where people are friendly, and I live in Minnesota, where people are nice, which means I'm a gracious and kind hostess; and I would love to have you back as often as you would like to visit.

And last bit of information: I have a fantastic giveaway going on thru Sunday, April 3, 2011; $50 in shop credit from Circle Line Studio. Be sure to check out that post and enter to win!! Over and Out...

Anna

Divine Designs: Circle Line Studio Giveaway

Spring Cleaning

Looking for an easy way to spruce up your interior this spring without paying a bundle? I've got just the thing for you... a $50.00 Shop Credit Giveaway from Circle Line Studio. Connie Norsworthy's vinyl wall decals are chic, fun, interesting and adorable!

Aren't these examples just fabulous?

If you aren't familiar with Connie's designs, please go right away and check out the endless possibilities for making each room in your house uniquely yours, whether you rent, own or like to frequently change the décor.

Contact the Artist

You can access Circle Line Studio by clicking on the ad in the right sidebar or going to http://circlelinestudio.bigcartel.com/ or http://www.etsy.com/shop/circlelinestudio. You can find Connie on Twitter at @Circle_Studio.

How to Enter

To be entered in this Giveaway, you can:

Leave a comment telling me your favorite thing about this week;

Follow Motherly Law on Facebook;

Follow @MotherlyLaw on Twitter;

Subscribe to a RSS feed for Motherly Law {in the box on the top, right sidebar}

Follow @Circle_Studio on Twitter;

Tweet about the Giveaway; or

Post on Facebook about the Giveaway.

Just be sure to leave a comment for EACH of the things you do to be entered multiple times for this Giveaway!

On Sunday at 7 PM CST I will pick the winner of the $50 Shop Credit to Circle Line Studio using www.random.org. Good Luck! Thanks, Connie, for sponsoring this Giveaway!

Anna

Life After Death: Your Online Digital Legacy

On Death & Dying

By the sound of the posts this week, I'm dwelling on death lately. I'm really not any more than my over-active, paranoid brain usually thinks about what would happen if...{fill-in-the-blank with any horribly sad newspaper headline ending in "leaving behind a devoted husband, two small boys, two giant dogs and three aging cats."} Regardless, these issues of estate planning must be attended to during our active lives to make everything easier on those who we leave behind if....

An Online Presence

I can count on one hand my friends and family members who don't have at least a Facebook account. Yet most have Facebook, Twitter, maybe an old MySpace page, a YouTube account, a blog {or two}, a Flickr or Tumblr account, a LinkedIn page and/or a host of lesser known social media networking sites. And I am going to venture a guess that just about everyone in this country has an email address; even my 87 year old grandma checks and sends email daily. Many people have e-trade accounts with passwords that change frequently or simply do all of their banking and bill paying online, etc. The list of online accounts is endless. We are one big online community.

To which of these groups do you belong? Do you have your accounts and passwords written down somewhere safe? Does your spouse or significant other, parent, child, friend or sibling know your passwords to these accounts? Your answer is probably no. More than likely you keep the passwords in your head and have shared them with no one.

So, what happens if you go to bed and don't wake up in the morning; or on the way home from work, your car is struck and you die? What will happen to your online digital legacy? Will your pages and accounts remain open and online? What do you want to happen to your blog(s) or other online writings, photos, etc.?

Last Digital Wishes

These are issues that have not traditionally been addressed when getting your estate plan in order, but these are now important issues if you have any online accounts. You might want information and photos from Flickr, Tumblr, YouTube, a blog, Facebook, etc. to remain visible and public for friends and family to continue to view, remember, feel close and mourn, but perhaps, you want an investment account, LinkedIn and a PayPal account closed.

On the flip side, if you don't record your wishes regarding your digital legacies, your family might think they should remove all online accounts, pages, etc. immediately. Yet, friends and family, especially those across the miles, may feel doubly sad and lost, losing all written and photographic memories of your times and experiences together.

Regardless of what you wish to be done with your accounts, you must record the information, share it with someone or use a service that will store, back up, secure, get rid of and/or notify loved ones with pre-written letters or videos, etc.

There are several services that have multiple levels with various price points depending on what services and the number of accounts you have. Here are a few to check out: Legacy Locker and Entrustet.

The Digital Afterlife Experts

Evan Carroll and John Romano run the site The Digital Beyond that is dedicated to all things regarding online digital legacies. They recommend naming a digital executor to handle all of your online information. A digital executor must understand the technology involved and that may not be the executor of your estate. Carroll and Romano further suggest making an inventory of the name of the account, passwords, etc. and what you want done with each of the accounts. You could use my free Financial and Legal Documents Records Book download for this purpose.

Terms of Use and Privacy Policies Regarding Death

It's important to review the terms of the online platforms you use to ensure your directions to your digital executor or other pre-designated arrangement upon your death do not violate the Terms of Use of Privacy Policies. For instance, you may not be able to transfer some online accounts to another person.

Twitter and Facebook do have policies handling the death of a site participant, which have some good points and are lacking in other ways. Facebook apparently allows for a memorialized page, but based on the number of comments from distraught family members of deceased Facebook users whose profiles have suddenly been removed or locked, Facebook needs to revisit its policy terms on this subject. The Digital Beyond lists other sites and their policies here.

Other Resources

This is a developing area of information. In the last few months there have been a number of articles written about this topic:

After Death, Protecting Your 'Digital Afterlife'

Digital Estate Planning: The Importance Of Giving Access To Online Accounts

Cyberspace When You're Dead 

2011 is Heating Up!

If you are concerned about digital information left on computers, but not online, such as financial records, photos, articles, drafts of literary or scholarly works, etc. read this article from the Wisconsin Lawyer by Nathan J. Dosch and Joseph W. Boucher where they address property rights, transferability, copyright issues and other matters concerning digital records stored on a deceased computer.

The Scoop

All in all, the moral of the story when it comes to estate planning is to, well...plan ahead. So, be prudent in how and where you list account numbers, passwords, user names and PINs, but do provide an inventory whether it's a list left with your attorney, in a Financial & Legal Records Book like the one in yesterday's post or through an online service, as referenced above.

It's a relatively simple process, but it does take time to keep it up-to-date and involves more than a pen and a stack of post-it notes stuck around the house {which is my preferred method of reminders and bits of important information}. Although 1 or 2 post-it notes left in strategic locations reminding you to take care of your online digital legacies is probably a good idea. Over and out...

Anna

And we interrupt this program with an important announcement from our sponsors...

I want to take this opportunity to introduce you to my lovely advertisers on Motherly Law. I now have 6 ads on the right sidebar {one is mine that leads you to my advertising information page}. I love the variety of goods and services represented here.

Erin and I Photo. As I wrote in a past post, these two sisters, Erin and Andi were great working with our family to get fabulous shots of all of us, but particularly the Darling Boys. We really enjoyed our photo shoot and got some wonderful photos. If you are in the Twin Cities be sure to check out their site {by clicking on the ad}. And contact them next time you need to update your family's photo album. They are creative and affordable.

Krazier Designs. Micah is a work from home dad of two young boys who juggles the demands of his web design business with that of fatherhood on a daily basis. Micah has designed several of these ads for Motherly Law's use. While Micah is located in the Twin Cities, he's able to work with clients in any location to build new websites or improve existing websites. Click on the Krazier Designs ad to contact Micah to discuss your design needs. I am eternally grateful for his generosity in offering design guidance for several Motherly Law and related projects.

Circle Line Studio. Connie Norsworthy designs fabulous vinyl decals. Until I came across Circle Line Studios when I heard the term "vinyl decals" what I pictured was the tacky decals for baby nurseries that could be had at BabiesRUs. Well, if that's what you picture, think again {and quickly click on her ad}. Connie's designs are super chic and fun at the same time, but NEVER tacky! I'm totally taken by these products. Click on the Circle Line Studio's ad to check out these room transforming designs. In fact, next week, Connie will be hosting a Giveaway on Motherly Law. So, if you like what you see {& you will} be sure to come back next week for a chance to win shop credit at Circle Line Studio.

Fabuliss. Sasha Westin is the woman behind this style assistance biz. Fabuliss offers wardrobe revamping, personal shopping, style and color consults, etc. Sasha assisted me with shopping for a suit for my two recent panel engagements and was a huge help in making my shopping trip successful and efficient. You can read about my personal shopping experience and the results here. Again, Sasha is based in the Twin Cities, but does do remote style consulting from photos, etc. Check out the Fabuliss site by clicking through the ad and get signed up for the Fabuliss Email Newsletter full of great style tips and information.

401(K) Recovery Program. If you lost ANY money with traditional 401(K) programs in the past several years, you should take a minute to check out the K Plan Retirement Advisors site. This is a new product that uses annuities instead of stocks to fund an account. There is no risk of losing any money. I know this is all true because this is my Dad's business and this product was developed by him {and he's a genius... I mean it}. No matter what your age is and no matter how much or how little you have to invest, this product is worth the time to learn more about it and decide if you are ready to stop risking losing your money again with the unpredictable stock market. Don't be the last person to realize the brilliance in this investment plan...click through and learn more.

The Scoop

I do need to tell you that while I truly think these advertisers have great businesses and/or products, I was either paid or exchanged goods and services with these advertisers for the ad space.

I still have more ad spots available. If you are interested in advertising with Motherly Law, please click through the "Your Ad Here" ad and go to my advertising information page for additional information and contact me at [email protected]. Over and out....

Anna

One Man’s Trash is Another Man’s Treasure: Tips for Selling on eBay, Craigslist and Amazon

When to Let Go

The dilemma: Whether to get rid of every piece of baby and tot gear, toys and clothes. Yes, the Darlings have outgrown these items; yes, we don't have the room for it in our home; and no, we are NOT having any more kidlets. So, clearly the reasonable answer is, yes.

I'm really not the type to get sentimental over the baby bed {my Darlings rarely slept in their baby beds despite our best efforts} or the pack & play or strollers, etc., but there are a few outfits, blankets, books and toys that I will be putting away for safe keeping. I don't really know why, but for now I'll hold on to a few things from those sweet days of babyhood.

I recently read that people are prone to price items too high for resale whether it's for a garage sale or eBay, Craigslist or other venue because we over value certain items when there's an emotional connection to that item. This is probably very often the case when it comes to baby gear and family heirlooms.

Tips for Great Ads

So, how do you get your online ad to stand out, attract buyers and sell? Here are a few simple tips:

1. Choose the right online classified platform for you: eBay, Craigslist or Amazon, in general. Do a bit of research to learn about the best items to sell on each site, the fees, if any, pricing, additional requirements, etc.;
2. Read the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy of the site you choose to ensure your ad will conform with their policies;
3. Write a detailed headline and use keywords in the title that will help your item reach the top of the list when similar items are searched;
4. Write a detailed and accurate description of the item to be sold. Remember to be honest regarding the amount of use, condition, etc. Be sure to include brand, model, size, color and other such information;
5. Provide a number of good quality and detailed photos of the item(s) to be sold. If there's no photo, many people won't even bother to view the ad {and I'm one of those people};
6. Proofread your ad {several times}. An error regarding a detail in the description, price, payment or shipping could cost you; and
7. If you will be shipping the item(s), offer reduced or free shipping. This will help you stand out among other sellers with similar items.

These few simple tips can help you succeed in selling quickly and making a profit, regardless of which site you choose.

What Not to Sell

But is there anything you should just throw away or donate rather than list online to sell? Yes. Each site has a list of items you are prohibited from selling; for Ebay’s list click here and for Craiglist list click here.

Additionally, this U.S. News and World Report list written by Amy Lu details the items you should never buy {or sell} used:

1. Cribs and children's furniture
2. Car seats
3. Bicycle helmets
4. Tires
5. Laptops
6. Software
7. Plasma and HDTVs
8. DVD Players
9. Digital and video cameras
10. Speakers and microphones
11. Camera lenses
12. Photo light bulbs
13. Mattresses and bedding
14. Swimsuits and undergarments
15. Wet suits
16. Shoes
17. Hats
18. Makeup
19. Pet Supplies
20. Vacuum cleaners

For the details as to why this is a list of no-nos to buy and/or sell used, click here for the whole U.S. News and World Reports article.

The Scoop

Tis the season for spring cleaning...I've found that sometimes it helps to have someone with an independent, unattached opinion on hand when going through a pile of discarded items in the basement and pricing these items for resale. Plus, it takes less time if you recruit a friend or family member to help out. I'm still trying to figure out the best option for our gently used goods. Over an out...

Anna

You might also like:

Alphabet Soup: Food Safety Standards; USDA, FDA, HHS & Now FSMA

The Overly Cautious Traveler: Must Read Pool Safety Tips

Distracted by Technology: Are Hands-Free Devices in SYNC with Safe Driving?