Hanging By a Thread

Agreeing to Disagree

I am the first to stand up for our right to free speech. I am accepting (not simply tolerant) of those from other countries, other religions, other parts of our country, different colors of skin, any sexual orientation or gender, other political parties and backgrounds. Not only am I accepting of these things, I think it makes life, our country, our world a better place with all of this diversity in it.

I try not to assume, but to ask questions instead. I try to be respectful and not lose patience with certain points of view. I do try…even if I am not always successful.

However, it's no longer enough to say "Hey, we are all entitled to our own opinions." "We can agree to disagree." "That's the great thing about the country, we don't all have to agree." "Where's the respect?"

But I am certainly not advocating for name calling or ugliness.

What I am clumsily trying to say is that there is a difference between disagreeing about whether to spend more on infrastructure which would raise taxes and disagreeing about whether it is acceptable for our president to tell blatant lies (repeatedly) and call people ugly, rude names and treat them like dirt any time anyone does not agree with him or dares to ask questions of him (or any of the MANY other things he does that is questionable, out-of-line or even against the constitution, a policy or law).

This is simply a very limited example of what I am addressing.

The difference between these two examples and agreeing to disagree is that regarding government spending there are (at least) two arguments to be made in debating and deciding what is best for our people and the country and the budget, and we can respect each of the positions made.

In the instance of our president telling lies (that can be easily checked to determine what the truth is), making up things that don't exist and calling people names and being really ugly to those who disagree with him and ask questions of him, there is never a time his behavior should be acceptable as the president of the United States of America. There are not two arguments to be made. There are not two sides to this coin. Period.

Your opinion on areas like taxes, military engagement, use of our land, environmental issues, health care, etc., are welcome and we can agree to disagree if that is how we end up. Again, these are normal political issues with multiple positions and considerations.

Telling lies, being verbally abusive and generally rude and ugly and throwing around one's weight for the sake of power are not political issues. We, as Americans with a democratic government, should never accept a leader who acts this way. NEVER!

{Warning: this is where my husband, Will, would like this post to end. Continue reading if you want my version of the ending.}

So, when it comes to agreeing to disagree or backing down from taking a stand or taking flak for not being respectful to the president or to others in ELECTED offices, I will not just get over it or be nice or take off the gloves. The liberal/broad-minded people have done that for far too long. That is why it's so shocking to the conservative/narrow-minded folks. The left wing is refusing to stand quietly in the corner while the right wing shouts down from their pedestal demanding respect and tolerance and religious freedom…based on their own narrowly drawn definitions….all while standing with a man who bows down to the golden calf and worships at the temple of greed and lust, throwing anyone who dares to stand in his way into the pit with the lions.

So, I am finished tiptoeing around, wearing the gloves to deal a soft blow or pretending I'm OK with someone's position to agree to disagree about how we treat people in this country. I will not call you names. I will not threaten you. I will not be apologetic for my position. I will not back down or shut up. I will not stop.

I will take a strong position. I will use my voice. I will call you out for your ignorance, if necessary. I will further explain my stance, if needed. I will agree to disagree on the political issues. Over and out…

Anna

Let Me Explain… #Misunderstood

I read a lot of news articles from a number of sources. I also share a lot of news articles. Most of what I post and share goes almost completely unnoticed, with the exception of the handful of like-minded Facebook friends who usually agree with me. Every once in a while, I strike a nerve. When I do, they are almost always Texans. I don't know if it is because they expect all Texans to think alike or that they just happen to notice a post every once in a while and then others see that they have noticed and jump on board too. Either way, each time, it costs me some "friends." But heck, I think that means we weren't really friends in the first place.

Regardless, I have been unclear in a Facebook post and I upset some people, and I decided I needed a space to be able to expand my thoughts and be clearer. My intention was not to upset people, not to put them on the defensive, but to help people to expand their views and open up their minds and worlds to see a bigger picture. I, at least partially, failed in doing this.

Here is what I shared.

"And Christians wonder why so many people are leaving religion. We, the Christians, often seem to be quite the hypocrites...for a great many years now, really. For this (erring human, who often falls short, but is always striving to be more like Jesus) Christian, it makes me very sad and angry. In my humble opinion, you can't support the Trump administration and all his minions and be a Christian. He goes against all tenets of Christianity. TO CLARIFY: I am making the point that in my opinion, you cannot both stand with Trump & his cronies & stand for Christian beliefs. I am sorry if you cannot see this point."

(The meme shared shows a family with the dad with an open Bible on his lap. The son says, "So if the Bible says we should help the poor, welcome the foreigner, heal the sick, respect others, not lie, not commit adultery, and not steal, then why do we support Donald Trump? And dad replies, "Oh, Billy. We don't actually practice these things. We only preach them.")    

The response I got from some, all of them related to me in some way, hurt my heart and made me realize how very far apart our views are, which is frustrating and confusing and very sad to me. Let me explain.

To begin with, here is a bit about me and what makes me tick because it is clear to me some friends and family may not understand me.

I feel things very deeply and passionately, all the way through me from my head to my toes. I have an unshakeable faith in my God and in the principles of Christianity. I am very loyal, and I will always do what I can when someone needs something. I wholeheartedly love my family, both near and far. I am sensitive, but tough. I will not back down from an argument or stance that I feel is important and true. I have an abiding sense of justice and what is right and wrong. I will engage with strangers if I think they are doing wrong and need correcting or calling out. I talk a lot sometimes, but I need silence and solitude and time alone to think, to be, to re-charge. Music and movies and animals and loss, whether mine or someone else's make me cry. My heart often trumps my head, even when I know better. I pray continually, all through the day.

I am also deeply political, meaning that I stay apprised of what the issues are and what is happening with our government policies and the overall attitude of all three branches of government. I feel very strongly about my duty and responsibility as a citizen of this country to be aware of what is happening in Washington, D.C., etc.

I like balance. I need to be able to reconcile where people stand with their beliefs and who they support. I need to be able to find reason for why things happen. I like to be in control of my surroundings, or at least in control of myself within my surroundings.

I seek beauty in all things, and I find it…in nature, in art, in stories, in music, in people. And I often take pictures of it or paint it or write about it.

I do not wish to condemn or judge. I wish to broaden worlds and minds and educate in all things in all ways.

I am profoundly hurt when I am misunderstood by people who I thought knew me and my heart. I have high expectations of people, and I don't allow all people to really get to know me. When I do, I feel very let down when they misinterpret my actions or words or do not support me in my endeavors. People often let me down. I suppose this is because I am rarely ever truly understood or truly known. And that really hurts.

So, short story long, it appears…this is who I am.

Now, what I meant when I shared the above or what I mean when I share other similar things is this: I cannot reconcile how someone who loves God and follows the tenets of Christianity can possibly support the hate-filled, fear mongering, abusive and divisive words and policies and lies of our current administration and the politicians who follow and enable it.

What I mean to say is: how can you support a president who uses such ugly words against and to describe women (or objects to be grabbed and used); who calls other politicians who fail to agree with him names and respects no one?

What I mean to say is: how can you stand beside this man whose policy – yes, his policy (do your homework) separates children from their parents. These are parents who seek a better, safer life for their children. Would you not do the same in their position? I really hope you would.

What I mean to say is: how can you stand with someone who wants to discriminate against people who are different than say a white, privileged, heterosexual male?

What I mean to say is: how can you stand with someone who simply lies because the truth just does not matter, or he doesn't know the difference between the truth and a lie or just doesn't care whether what he says is true? Honestly, I don't know why he does it, but it does not matter why. He lies. That is all that one needs to know.

What I mean to say is: how can you support someone who calls himself a nationalist? In case you don't know, the term nationalism, based on a dictionary definition means: an extreme form of patriotism, especially marked by a feeling of superiority of other nations. Nazis were considered nationalists, as an, albeit extreme, example. Now, white nationalists are neo Nazis and KKK members. There is a difference, but honestly, when Trump said that he was a nationalist just this week in Houston, I am not sure if he was pandering to extreme patriots or those who hate people of color. Either way, how can you stand with this man?

I think that conservative/Republican America has underestimated the sadness, the fear, the anger and the depth of feelings that liberal/Democrat America has involving this administration. There is a deeper divide in our country than there has been in a great while.

What I mean to say is that how can you stand along side a man who seeks to destroy our entire institution of democratic government?

If you stand on your religion as your base, and hold tight to abortion issues and gay rights issues, you need to broaden your knowledge of issues concerning this country. First of all, this administration does not care about your religion, not one iota. Secondly, I recognize there is no point for me to try to convince you that abortion will not go away if it is illegal, but that women (and fetuses) will die in desperation, doing whatever they can to obtain an abortion, legal or not. And on top of that, abortion numbers have been going down and down and down for years, but I won't argue with you about that. Thirdly, LGBTQIA rights really don't concern you unless you fall into those categories, but as a religious person, I believe you should seek to love all people and treat them with kindness and mercy. Remember God loves all people and does not make mistakes. They and you will be judged one day, but you don't have to worry about them.

So, what I mean to say is this. If I struck a nerve with this post, maybe it's is because you realized you don't know that much about the policies and stances of this administration and you need to learn more. Or perhaps you realized you need to change your ways or maybe you just don't know me very well and you should ask me to explain what I mean.

I am open to discussions, but the comments made it clear that my point had been missed. I am not sure if it is possible for the veil that divides our thoughts and stances on this administration to be lifted so that your eyes can be opened to why I feel the way I do or how I hear and see what is happening or vice versa (because I do not understand how anyone still supports this man and his regime).

I don't want to give up on you, and I don't want you to give up on me. However, I do want you to understand that to me these issues I discussed are not just passing political rhetoric, but are fundamental principles on how people should treat other people and how we should approach our world, our country, our neighbors.

This is why my heart hurts so much. I see that there are so many people I love and care about and admire and trust that are blind to the greed, the hate, the lies, the fear being instilled in them every day by this administration and its minions, including FOX news. And I don't seem to be able to reach these people. And yet, if you need me, I will be here. I will not stop loving you. I will not stop being loyal. I will not stop standing up for what I believe is true. I will not stop praying for you, our nation and its leaders. I will not be silent. I will not stop attempting to broaden minds and attitudes.

If after all this explanation and look into my head and heart, you cannot see me for who and what I am and stand for, perhaps you might think to yourself, "I should try to get to know her better to understand her more." Of course, you might also think, "I don't care what she thinks or how she feels." And that's fine too. It's up to you.

This is who I am. Peace to you. Over and out…

Anna

The Power of Impact

To start with, I've had a bad cold. I got it from my boys over the weekend while traveling. Of course, it means nothing when mom gets a cold. Life goes on. So, I have been tired and cranky and generally feeling cruddy all week. Thursday was no exception, but then my mood got worse. And on Friday, I woke with a tremendously heavy sadness on my heart and mind. Here's why.

On, Thursday, the boys and I spent the day with my computer or phone on a live feed of the Senate Judiciary Committee, watching both Dr. Christine Blasey Ford and Judge Brett Kavanaugh testify before the nation.

I knew only her story and very little else about Dr. Ford before her testimony. I thought I believed her story, but was anxious to hear her and see her tell her side of things to determine her credibility in my own mind…not that my opinion of her matters in the least.

I was struck by her calm, yet genuine and terrified-beneath-the-surface demeanor. I understood how she felt sitting there sharing her most devastating details of shame and guilt and confusion and sadness and aloneness that she has been carrying with her for 36 years. My heart went out to her.

We listened to her words and watched her face and heard her tone and completely believed her. She gains nothing and has lost much in coming forward to speak. My heart broke for her.

Listening to her speak about her 15 year old self and this bewildering, traumatizing experience took me back to my teenage years. I recalled two distinct times that I allowed myself to get into a vulnerable position, during high school, about 28 years ago. Now, I say that I allowed myself to get into a vulnerable situation because time and time again we see that it is the woman's responsibility to steer clear of such situations and it's her fault if she does not.

Now, in my case, nothing happened to me in either of these instances, but I am now and was then well aware that it could have. Just knowing I was in a situation that made me feel trapped and vulnerable, I can clearly recall all kinds of details about the space I was in, the smells, the sounds, some (but not all) of the people there or nearby, how I felt and what I was thinking, but I could not give you a date and I could not name each person there. I'm not even sure of the exact year. This does not mean it didn't happen.

I imagine that if you asked the other people who were there with me during those two instances they would not recall these things in such detail. In fact, I would bet they would not have any recollection of these instances at all. This does not mean it didn't happen.

I NEVER told anyone about these instances…not my best friend, not my mother, not my husband. No one. This is the first time I have ever shared anything about these two instances outside of my own mind. I did not tell anyone because I felt shame for allowing myself to get into such situations. This does not mean it didn't happen.

The reason it stands out in my memory so vividly and has stayed with me all of these years is that it had a significant impact on me. After the second instance, I promised myself then, in high school, I would not allow myself to get into such a vulnerable situation again. These two instances scared me and cautioned me and trained me and shaped me.

I can imagine that the other people involved in these two instances didn't recall it happening a year after it occurred, let alone 5 or 10 or 22 years later. This is simply because it did not have an impact on them. It did not scare them or worry them or warrant a change in how they approached certain people or situations.

Now, going back to Dr. Ford and Judge Kavanaugh, one of them is not telling the truth, or at least not remembering what happened correctly. One of them was not impacted by this experience. My money is on Judge Kavanaugh as being the one who is not telling the whole truth and/or not remembering the instance correctly and thoroughly.

Judge Kavanaugh's demeanor and attitude also made me think of instances, both in working in the courts and general life experiences, of privileged men who are used to getting what they want when they want it, and then get caught being bad and are at risk of not getting what they want.

He yelled and deflected blame and repeated the same answers over and over and made accusations. He was evasive and sometimes responded with silence. He talked back and whined and cried. He was all kinds of emotional and belligerent and haughty. I have seen this behavior. I know this kind of behavior. I have seen this behavior from grown men, but any parent will recognize this kind of adolescent, rebellious, defensive fit throwing, as well.

This spoiled, whining, privileged man child having a huge meltdown temper tantrum was watched by thousands and thousands of people, and I believe it will have an impact.

The impact will not be on the male Republican Senators who rebuked the Democrats for causing such pain and suffering for this upstanding man and his family…at least not directly…and who will vote to confirm Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court of the United States.

The impact will not be on Kavanaugh who will most likely still get his way and be appointed for life to the United States Supreme Court. His family is not ruined. They will move on from this. But let me say, I am sad for his wife and daughters who are having to go through all of this because of their husband and father.

And yet, I do think there will be an impact. I think there already is a wave of change that has been gathering momentum and speed and depth and integrity and raw, composed rage. It's coming….just you wait.

For now, I will keep explaining and teaching and showing my boys what is right and wrong; what justice looks like; what respect looks like; what mercy looks like; what integrity looks like; and how Jesus instructs Christians to act.

From a different perspective, as a student of the law with a deep respect for the highest court in our land and for (most) of the justices who sit on the Supreme Court of the United States, I am greatly distressed, disappointed and frustrated. Putting aside whether he has repeatedly, on several topics, lied before Congress and whether he sexually assaulted one or more women, the person who has emerged under pressure in these hearings is NOT the kind of impartial, rational, discerning person the United States Senate should be placing on the Court. Our highest court of the land deserves better than this. We, the people of this democracy, deserve better than this.

My heart breaks and my blood boils for all people everywhere who have been hurt, broken, taken advantage of, assaulted, raped and have told their stories only to be threatened, ridiculed and worst of all, ignored.

I hear you. I believe you. You matter. You have made an impact. You are not alone. Everyone does eventually get his day in court; before his maker, that is.

Over and out…

Anna

For the Love of My Children

Here's what I know. Nothing is for sure. Everything can change. We are no better than any other country. Our country and its government are not at its most stable and certainly not at its most proud moment in history. Jesus Christ instructs us to love and show kindness and mercy and aid to all people.

I also know deep down to the core of my existence that I will do anything to keep my children safe and healthy. ANYTHING. If that means leaving everything I know behind and trekking across countries, mile after mile, to seek asylum from dangerous people and conditions, I would do it. It would be scary and painful and confusing. It would take immense faith and strength and patience and courage. But it would all be worth it if I knew in my heart of hearts that it was the best…maybe the ONLY…option for keeping my children safe, and I would do it.

I hope you would too.

I think you would.

I bet you love your children as much as I love mine.

So, WHY OH WHY, is this so hard for so many people to understand the plight of these people pouring into the borders after making the very long and difficult trek from their dangerous and unstable homelands?

And how is it possible that not ALL moms and dads (or really ALL people) in the U.S. are not completely outraged at the separation of children and parents and detaining of those seeking asylum at the border. {I do realize that the separation has supposedly stopped, but there are still scores of families who are separated and children facing judges alone.}

These children and parents keep me up at night and fill my prayers and consume my thoughts. The whole of it breaks my heart and makes my blood boil.

And it hurts my heart that I don't see and hear every person in this country in an uproar by all of this purposeful breaking up of families already in peril and in need of love, support and aid.

I realize immigration is a complex issue, but accepting refugees and immigrants into these borders since even before our founding is what has made our country so strong and complex and vibrant and full of innovation and creative spirit and thriving cities and farmlands and communities of all sizes from border to border.

And if one can't see that, then you need to go back to the beginning of U.S. history and study how and why our country came to be. Include in that history how the early settlers disregarded those borders and lands of the people who were already living here, eventually completely disregarding the people too and not just their territories.

Don't forget to read about how we rounded up and kept fenced in the Japanese Americans {mind you, they were American citizens} when we went to war against Japan during WWII.

Of course, a large portion of our history should cover our forefathers, the slaveholders, and the treatment of the Africans kidnapped from their own countries and taken from their own borders and forced into ours. Go on through the Civil War and remember to take special note as to why brothers fought brothers during this most terrible war {Hint: it wasn't merely state's rights; it was really concerning one right: the right to own another human being.}

Look at how we treated the freed slaves and how LONG it took for us to pass laws that made our laws apply to all people within our borders, including African Americans, women, Native Americans and LGBTQ folks.

Make sure to read about all the different points in our history that various groups of immigrants sought refuge through our ports. Of course, each of us have a personal family history to learn from, as well.

After all of the reading and studying and researching to learn and remind and open your heart and mind, I hope you will see how very abundantly we, as a country, have been blessed by all of these cultures and histories and ethnicities blending and sharing and building into one United States of America.

BUT in the end, this particular situation comes back to the only thing that matters right now. Families seeking asylum are being turned away or separated and jailed. This is not right.

I want you to take a minute to realize that this could happen to you. It could. Our country could slide into complete chaos. We could fight a war on our soil. We could become the ones in need of protection and need to leave our country and enter another country's border. Don't kid yourself.

If you can't bring yourself to imagine a bleak U.S. future, then recall that by the grace of God you were born into a free country or had the good fortune to be able to come to this country and become a citizen; that parents in all countries all over God's green earth love their children so much that they would do ANYTHING to protect them; that sometimes you have to risk everything to keep your kids safe, even if that means breaking the law and entering a border illegally, in order to get help and make a new start; that Jesus would help these people and calls upon us to do the same; and that Joseph, Mary and Jesus once were refugees in Egypt, fleeing Herod's murderous rampage inflicted upon young children.

You might be asking yourself, "A bleeding heart liberal and a Christian? Can it be possible?" Oh, yes! Take heart; there are a number of us out there. I'm proud to wear both badges.

If when I die, people say that I stood for love and mercy and justice and always stood up for those who could not speak up for themselves, then I will feel that I have accomplished something in my life.

If you feel so inclined to do something for these families, please check out Raices Texas – pronounced Rah E Cis – standing for Refugee and Immigrant Center for Education. They are a Texas nonprofit organization that works to pair immigration attorneys with the parents and kids in custody, pays for their bonds and is working hard to reunify families and pursue asylum, when necessary.

Over and out…

Anna

Shattering Glass

Last night, while standing in my kitchen, I was overcome with a flood of emotions and shed a few tears thinking about voting for a woman presidential candidate on Tuesday and all that could mean. Sure, this may seem silly or trivial to you and you may shake your head in disgust or confusion, but to this bossy girl who has never backed down from an argument with a man and NEVER thought women should be standing behind a man instead of next to or in front of a man, this is big…dare I say…YUGE!

And it's not just that it's a woman, it's this woman: Hillary Clinton. I am so proud to be voting for her tomorrow. Again, you may not understand this, but I DO like her, respect her and think she has what it takes to be president. She has been standing her ground and fighting for people for so long and NEVER giving up…EVER. Hillary has more stamina than people half her age; she amazes me! This is the kind of strong, smart, experienced woman I have dreamed of becoming president.

But I'm not here to convince you. At this late hour, you have made your decision and likely already cast your vote. No, I'm simply brimming with emotions and excitement and anxiety and maybe you are too.

So, tomorrow I'll go with my two boys and color in that little oval as my boys witness this momentous occasion, we'll get the I VOTED sticker and I might spill a few tears thinking of all the women who have come before and made crack after crack in that glass ceiling, giving me the right to vote, the strength to voice my strong opinions, the opportunity to get an education and become an attorney and the chance to vote for female candidates in races at every level of government. I can't tell you how excited I am about this!

I will wait on pins and needles and monitor polls and news reports as polls close and counts come in, and you can bet I'll be praying for our nation, our leaders and our citizens.

This is personal. I am a woman. I am a Christian. I am a mom. I support love and mercy and kindness and coming together, helping those who can't help themselves and living in harmony, regardless of differing backgrounds, opinions, religions and standing up for all peoples' rights. I refuse to succumb to an Us v. Them, hateful, fearful, antagonist, racist, misogynistic attitude.

I…we…have a lot at stake tomorrow. I know I am not alone in this flood of emotions leading up to this day. So, here's to all the women (and men) who have fought so hard for women's rights. I can't wait for that glass ceiling to shatter. Over and out…

Anna

Be a Political Person {Talking Politics with Our Kids}

I often see people post on social media, "I'm not a political person, but…" And I always want to respond, "Why not? What's wrong with being a political person?" I think what they mean is they aren't usually one to argue over political issues by posting them for all their friends to read and discuss, but I just don't see anything wrong with being a "political person." And for the record, you can call me just that, if you're so inclined.

In our house, politics is not a dirty word. In fact, political knowledge and discussions are something to be proud about…although the kids do have an approved and unapproved list of people they can discuss such politics with…the approved list is pretty short, come to think of it...

But, seriously, political issues are important and we should be discussing them in our homes and in schools. This doesn't mean taking sides and arguing and segregating based on beliefs and political party affiliations. It means learning about issues facing our elected officials, the laws and policies concerning the economy, the environment, the educational system, the poor, job opportunities within our country, relations with other countries, the military, etc., etc., etc., and the arguments on both sides.

So, at this juncture in American politics, I am thrilled to be teaching my kids at home because this means we can discuss and study any and all areas of politics. And we do. We talk about what's happening along this long campaign trail. We read articles, watch video clips and of course, check out the political parodies. We watched the debates with the boys and explained various points afterwards, but I think they have a pretty good grasp on what's what at this point.

They're looking forward to going with us to vote, as always. And I can't wait for next week when this Political Science major gets to teach a whole week on the Electoral College, the interesting elections of the past and anything and everything we can find to watch, read and learn about the election process. I'll be trying to channel my beloved Poli Sci Professor, Dr. Flavin, and his enthusiasm for all things electoral.

If we don't talk about such things at home and with our kids over the dinner table, in the car, in the midst of a "nasty" political race (sorry, I had to get it in), after the President addresses the nation, during a legislative stalemate, where will our kids get the confidence to discuss such issues? How will they understand the who and why and how of our nation's politics and our and their personal views as they grow into adults.

So, be a "political person" and talk about the processes, the difference between parties and how and why and who of local, state and federal government. Discuss your personal feelings and beliefs and where that falls within political parties. Talk about the "other side" and what they believe and why those issues are important to them. We live in a democratic society, and this cannot exist without talking and discussing the differences, the areas we can agree upon and how to make our system work for everyone. After all, a democratic society is defined as one that is run by the people, for the people and supports equal rights, freedoms of the individual, fair trials and minority views. Let's not forget that.

And remember GO VOTE! {Preferably with your kids in tow.} I actually saw someone post on social media that she usually doesn't vote, but this one is an important one so she voted…ALL ELECTIONS ARE IMPORTANT! {Sorry, I had to step up on my soap box for a minute….remember, I AM a "political person."} Over and out…

Anna

Open Letter to Republicans from a Friendly Democrat Who’s Worried for You

I've been wrestling with this for a bit. I've been trying to decide whether to keep my mouth shut or speak up. If you know me very well, you know that keeping quiet is something that is VERY difficult for me.

What bothers me most is injustice, hate, bigotry and ignorance. And if these things don't bother you, I'm concerned for the state of our country and you won't get my point here. So, you might as well move on now. If it does bother you, then this is for you.

Let me be clear. I am not anything close to a Republican, but I am seriously worried about the future of the Republican Party. Truly.

It's up to you, Republicans, to stand up together to take back your Party! Democrats can rant and stomp our feet and share articles and information and vote, but none of that will change the fate of your political party.

You must take a firm stance and be the face of strength and certainty and truth. Maybe I'm just a liberal optimist, but I really feel that the true Republican is not racist and hate-filled, intolerant of all people with exception to those who look and act like themselves.

At this point, you, the Republicans, have allowed a loud-mouthed, bigoted, buffoon to take over your Party. If you are happy about this and support Trump then it's clear to me that you must be an ignorant, unintelligent person who can't think for himself and is full of hate and fear. And if that's the case, I think you're probably a lost cause, but I'll be praying for you. Now, I know many Republicans aren't happy about this, BUT you aren't doing anything to take back your Party.

This confounds me.

Unless, I'm wrong and you all, the Republicans, are all racist, privileged, fearful, feeble-minded people, herded as easily as cattle. But I just cannot believe that is true.

So, what are you going to do? Whatever it is, you better do it NOW! Time is running out for you.

I suggest a little history lesson. Do some research and find out what it is the Republican Party represented and believed in and take a look at its roots. Look at a few of the past Republican presidents…Ronald Reagan, perhaps. Read some articles. Do some fact checking. Take a minute to remember who you are, what you believe and where you want to go. Go ahead, take a look at what Trump stands for, paying close attention to the words he uses. Check to see if his views align with yours. You might even want to read about Germany in the early days of Hitler's rule… here's an interesting point to ponder on that topic.

Even if you don't support him, he could very well be YOUR Republican candidate, whether you like it or not.

Oh, and for the record there is a [h]Uge difference between refusing to be politically correct, speaking your mind, saying things how you see them and being disrespectful, rude, ignorant, distasteful, hateful and downright ugly. Trump is the latter – always.

Heck, I'm from Texas, and I say things that aren't politically correct all the time (without even realizing it) and I ALWAYS speak my mind. This I can respect, but that is NOT what Trump is doing. I know the difference. If you don't understand and see the difference….well, again, I'll be praying for you.

Me? I'm happy with either of my Party's choices this election season. Over and out…

Anna

Be Kind and Do the Right Thing {It’s Really That Simple, Isn’t it?}

What if we made decisions based on reason and good sense and because it was in the best interest for all or at least most? What then?

What would our world look like? What would we think of our leaders then? How would we feel about mankind? How would we feel about ourselves?

There are a few things that have really bothered me over the last few weeks; items from news headlines and articles. Here they are {in brief} and my thoughts on them {in brief…as brief as I can be}:

All Parents have Challenges

Gwyneth says moms with "regular" jobs working 9 to 5 have it easier than "movie stars" working 14 hours on location.

My Take: Don't compare yourself to others and their situations. You have no idea the challenges, burdens and sacrifices that another has faced or is facing. Simply be kind to others and live your own life. And if you don't like your life, take steps to change that – this goes for "movie stars" too.

I have no doubt it is challenging to be a celebrity and a mom, but it is also challenging to be "regular" mom working 9 to 5 in an office or working from home or working shifts or whatever a mom's situation is. Can we just agree it's challenging to be a mom?

Government could Save $400 Million with One Simple Change

Fourteen year-old boy comes up with a simple (& proven) way to save the federal and state governments $400 million dollars each year by changing the font in which they use for printing purposes; Times New Roman uses more ink than Garamond. By printing in Garamond, the governments would save this astronomical (to me) amount in ink costs.

My Take: This is remarkable. And yet, will the branches of government even consider such a change; a change that could mean closing the gap in other areas of their budgets or that this money could go towards more important things than ink? I doubt it. It seems that the government (federal and state) and the politicians running them are rarely interested in ways to truly be economical or do what is safer, healthier or smarter with our money. It is almost always about spending money in their districts or with their constituents or something that will benefit them personally, I am sorry to say.

But wouldn't it be great to see the government truly working with this 14 year-old and implementing this simple change?

If the government was run like a household budget, the government would most certainly try this money-saving plan.

Watch YourSELF! Don't be a Bully!

Self Magazine published a photo of two women running in a marathon wearing superhero-inspired tutus…and featured it in their BS Meter, Legit or Lame segment, calling it lame and making fun of them for wearing the tutus…one of the runners in the photo has cancer, ran while doing chemo and makes and sells the tutus to help fund a youth development program for girls…

My Take: This whole thing really smells to high heaven. They asked permission to use this photo and then proceeded to make fun of her and her friend… that's bad enough. But then, they find out she has cancer and was going through chemotherapy during the time she ran and she does good with the money she makes in selling these tutus….wow!

So, editors at Self, clearly you failed miserably on this photo, but I think you have failed overall with this whole segment. Who are you to poke fun at anyone? Even if she and her friend were simply runners, no cancer or nonprofits involved, it's not OK to make rude comments about someone. That is bullying behavior. I say ditch your BS Meter altogether.

I applaud the self-expression, and you can call me lame if you like, but anything superhero-inspired is cool in our household. And seriously, these two women were RUNNING A MARATHON! They ROCK…period!

Privacy Issues in School Bathrooms

There was a recent incident in a St. Paul school when a janitor was inappropriate in a boys bathroom.

My Take: As a mom to boys, I have often thought this is a bad idea for the men on staff to share a bathroom with the boys in the school, considering there are urinals and not just stalls. I think both boys and the male teachers/staff should have privacy in a bathroom at school. And having separate bathrooms for students and personnel affords protection from such instances, for both the adults and students. Of course, the same can be said for the girls bathrooms too, but there are at least stalls and doors, giving more privacy. And really, I'm not sure urinals without enclosures have a place in schools.

Suing Your Parents is NOT a Good Idea…EVER

A high school student sued her parents, trying to force them to pay for her college expenses. The suit was dropped and the girl moved home, fortunately.

My Take: Don't bite the hand that feeds you. Clearly, this girl had lost her way somewhere and has hopefully found her path again now. There was little basis to her lawsuit. There was no evidence of abuse or neglect. Instead, it appeared to be a case of a girl not wanting to follow her parents' rules (which by reports from her parents were not terribly restricting) and leaving home on her own accord to live with a friend's family once she turned 18, but wanting her parents to continue to fund her life.

This friend's father was an attorney. It sounds like he talked her into suing her parents for her Catholic high school tuition payment and college living expenses for the next year. This is very unfortunate, it not only put attorneys in a bad light yet again, it also makes the girl look like a spoiled rotten, greedy brat (which may not have been the case at all) and these shenanigans cost all involved a great deal of expense and energy and heartache….all for nothing.

Usually simply talking out a problem is a good and cheap solution to most familial issues.

These are the headlines that have been knocking around in my head lately. And now you know my take on them. Over and out…

Anna

 

 

 

Related articles

Superheroes {Believe}

News Flash: Cancer is Killing Us {but we can Fight back}

Who Am I to Judge?

A Little Background

I'm not Catholic, but I go to a Catholic church. My husband is Catholic, and my kids were baptized in the Catholic Church. I love the Basilica I go to. I have not always felt this way about Catholic churches or any church community, for that matter.

Growing up, I went to a variety of churches, Methodist, First Christian, Presbyterian and non-denominational. My dad was a seminary student when I was born and went on to be a Presbyterian minister for a time.

I have never, not once, doubted the existence of my God and the teachings of the Bible. I have a steadfast faith and a running conversation with my Lord. I do not pretend to be a perfect Christian, but it is ever my goal to be more like Christ in my attitudes, words and actions.

When I walked into the Basilica of St. Mary in downtown Minneapolis back in the fall of 2003, shortly after moving to the Twin Cities, I immediately felt it; a peace and joy so pure that tears came to my eyes. It's the feeling you get in the presence of God. It's the feeling I get every time I walk through those doors.

I knew this was the place we belonged. I have never felt like a non-Catholic there. I simply feel welcome. At the Basilica everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, is welcome to come through those doors to worship; to find peace and love and joy and redemption. We sit among people of every color and financial status and background.

At the Basilica people are not judged; they are comforted, they are prayed for, they are helped, they are loved, as Jesus would do. The poor, the hungry, the needy, the socially chastised, the broken, the lost are welcomed and cared for with open arms, hot coffee, a sandwich, a prayer and a plan to get to them back on their feet, healthy, in a home, clothed, re-employed, etc.

That's how I think it should be. From what I have observed over the course of the last 10 years, the Basilica follows the example of Jesus.

Pope Francis

I have never especially cared about what goes on at the Vatican. The Pope and his enclave didn't seem to get it; they were out of touch with reality of what the people needed and how to reach the people and care for the poor, the sick, the hungry, the hurt of the world.

And then came Pope Francis. I was impressed from the start. Of course, there were detractors and people who didn't agree with bucking the system. I, generally a skeptic, kept waiting for Pope Francis to show his true colors; be swayed by the lavish historical tradition of the pontiff; don the royal robes and start looking and acting like all the popes who have come before him…. he hasn't.

Pope Francis just keeps on doing what Jesus would do. He doesn't seem to miss a beat; living life as a humble servant, without gilt thrones and luxurious robes, going out into the world, making contact with untouchables, severely reprimanding and removing those in his herd who step out of line and forget who and what they represent by building $41 million shrines to themselves, etc. Pope Francis encourages the world to love and not hate.

He has angered some "conservatives" with his statements regarding abortion, same-sex marriage, etc., saying "Who am I to judge?" But I would argue that he is right. It is not our call to judge others. We are to live as Jesus did.

Jesus

Jesus hung out with the poor, the criminals, the diseased, the afflicted. He spoke truth and showed love and patience and mercy. This is no easy feat. If we all did this, we'd live in a different world.

Jesus DID NOT shove his beliefs down the throats of those he met. Instead he told them stories; stories they could relate to; people listened. Jesus NEVER once told anyone what they believed was wrong and that he was there to change their views.

Instead, he lived simply, shared what he had, did the right thing and shunned no one, inviting them to follow him.

The Scoop

I just read an article from the New York Times on how "conservative" Catholics are upset with the new Pope in which a Catholic blogger was quoted as being angered by a statement made by the Pope to an atheist. Pope Francis basically said we all have our own ideas of good and evil and that we must follow the good and fight the evil as we conceive it. In response, the blogger said, "What kind of a Christian tells an atheist he has no intention to convert him?"

I would argue that the very first Christian himself would not tell a nonbeliever that it was his intent to convert him. I would imagine Jesus would have been hospitable, engaging this fellow in conversation, breaking bread with him and they would each have had a go at explaining their positions. I would surmise that when they parted ways, regardless of whether the nonbeliever had a change of heart, Jesus would have been kind and courteous, sending him away with blessings.

That is the kind of person he was. And this is the kind of Leader Francis seems to be. I, for one, am praying for his good health and safety in order to do much good, touch as many hardened, hurt, discouraged, scourged, rich, poor, blessed, those with a voice and those without, spreading joy and comfort and peace and hope throughout the world.

Over the years, churches and religious organizations have formed opinions and posted edicts of how to act and what to say and whom to judge and whom to hate and who will go to heaven and who won't. Man is not God.

A Christ-like life is really quite simple and yet so difficult.

And who are any of us to judge? Over and out….

Anna

Related articles

Conservative U.S. Catholics Feel Left Out of the Pope's Embrace

Superheroes {Believe}

My son tells me he wants to be Iron Man when he grows up; as in, be a billionaire genius who flies around in an iron suit, saving the world.

My other son tells me his favorite superhero is Green Arrow, as he stands in front of me in his dark green hoodie, holding his Native American styled bow and arrow. Not bad choices; two of my favorites, I'll admit.

There have been quite a number of superheroes march through the pages of comic books, saving the world on the small screen and big screen alike, racking up the fans and inspiring new stories and new superheroes.

Lately, we have been particularly obsessed with superheroes; Iron Man, Batman, Captain America, Thor, Green Lantern, Spiderman, Green Arrow, Superman, Wonder Woman, the Hulk and the list goes on.

Why is this?

What is it about these masked, costumed, larger than life, super strength humans {and a few aliens}, swinging, flying, crouching through the dark of the night, waiting to save us, mere mortals, from the big, dark, ugly evil of the world that makes us love them so?

These superheroes are generally handsome, good-natured, misunderstood and witty. They often have the financial means or influence to get the tools and technology necessary to foil the enemy. But they are not immune from love and loss, pain and suffering; they feel joy and hurt, just as we do.

Our world has been full of hate, terror, mistrust, uncertainty and despair in the last few years, and it seems to be growing. We are looking for salvation, an answer, an escape from a bleak outlook.

Is it any wonder there has been a surge in our wonderment, adoration and devotion of these mysterious figures?

Really, the only difference between us and them is their resolve and drive to right the wrongs committed by the dark evil surrounding us in this world. They train their bodies and minds; they keep their eyes on the goal; they allow themselves to feel the pain and suffering of others. No matter the blows, the broken bones and spirits, they keep getting up and fighting back.

Despite their goodness at heart, honorable intentions and super hero feats, the ruling powers that be generally call them vigilantes, criminals, trouble-makers or worse when they first come crashing into the scene.

The people are skeptical; it's in our nature to question anything new or different. We have trouble accepting that there could actually be superheroes in our midst; those with pure intentions, big hearts, selfless souls, willing to lose everything if this evil can be defeated.

We need this. We need to believe in superheroes. We need to see the superhero in those who fight for good, who stand up for freedom, who walk the walk and talk the talk, with purity of heart and soul. They are out there; they wear their disguises well. Have you seen any?

They may not wear {visible} capes or hoods; they may not carry weapons or sling webs or come from Krypton. They may not be billionaires. They may not be larger than life.

They do put others first, believe in their causes, refuse to give up and deeply, passionately feel everything. They are not swayed by disappointments, setbacks, disabilities or losses. They are often misunderstood and overlooked. They are determined; you can see this in their eyes.

Believe. Believe in a better world. Believe and keep watching for those superheroes. You might even be one of them. Over and out…

Anna

Definition of a Leader

I looked up the definition of a leader. The first definition I came across was this:

Leader

1:  something that leads: as

a :  a primary or terminal shoot of a plant

b :  tendon, sinew

There were a number of other definitions for leader, but this one struck a chord in me and gave me a wonderful visual for a leader. That is, in regards to a leader of people.

A leader {of people} does lead the way for the others who follow, just as a primary shoot does for the growing plant. A leader is not alone. A leader is a part of the whole. A leader is not above all the rest. A leader merely forges ahead, clearing a path, preparing the way.

As with the shoot of a plant, a tendon or sinew is also part of the whole. A tendon is a connective tissue that attaches muscle to bone or muscle to muscle and can withstand tension. A tendon does not act alone within the body; all the parts must work together as a team to move and perform tasks.

Leaders {of people} must work in communion with their teams; with their people. A leader who abuses power or looks down upon the others in the group will not truly lead people, but will by force and fear and pressure push those underlings to perform and obey.

Good leaders lead by example, always moving ahead one step at a time.

Great leaders raise others up with them and send them out into the world prepared to become primary shoots, capable of supporting and growing new leaves and fruit of their own.

Great leaders, like loving parents, are excited and supportive when their pupils fly the coop, so to speak. Great leaders know these young, fresh leaders will always be loyal and trustworthy because they were raised up and trained in this way.

Great leaders see the big picture for what it is, even when it isn't pretty. Great leaders are not afraid of open discourse because it usually leads to a solution or new idea. Limiting ideas or discussions will stunt the growth of the whole group and lead to decay.

Great leaders like to shine the light on others, rather than continually standing in the spotlight.

In referring back to the original definition of a leader, great leaders are not terminal shoots. A terminal shoot grows a bud at the end of the shoot, causing the shoot to grow longer, but that bud sends hormones back down the shoot, inhibiting growth of other buds on that shoot. A "terminal" leader excels and looks like a big shot, growing bigger and higher than the others, but this kind of leader is really alone and is not actually leading at all.

We have leaders at work and in schools and in politics and at church and in our communities and in various organizations. Leaders can be great whether leading one or one million. Some are born great leaders and others develop into great leaders.

The world is always in need of great leaders. Are you one? Do you know a great leader? Sometimes it seems that we are running out of great leaders in this culture of greed and self-promotion, but if you look you will still find great leaders, quietly toiling, empowering others to do their jobs well, whatever those tasks are. Over and out….

Anna

 

Conclusion: The Trouble with the World is Complacency

The difference between complacency and living on purpose is a matter of ignorance.

If you don't know (or care about) the dangers or the concerns or the repercussions of what you are eating, where you are living, activities you are engaged in, people you are hanging out with, habits you are forming, products you are buying or using or leaders and causes you are supporting, then you're complacent; satisfied with the ways things are regardless of whether it's a positive or negative effect.

Not so bad, you say? Well, that all depends. Do you want to live in the shadows or do you want to be out in the light? Do you want to be fully informed or just another drone going through the motions? Do you want to be living life to the fullest and teaching your kids to do this as well or do you shrug your shoulders and think, whatever happens, happens; I have no control over things.

Complacency: the reluctance to take charge of your life and the outcome of situations concerning you and your family.

Have you ever noticed that some people are continually surrounded and caught up in the swirling vortex of drama; things just happen to them and the people around them....constantly. And yet, I have noticed that generally these people never formulate a plan or stand up to the architect of the drama or announce a call to action. No, instead they merely shrug and say, "Why do these things keep happening to me/my family/my friends?" But instead of a stand down or a decision or a plan, they simply say, "Oh well."

I say take the bull by the horns. Do not live with complacency. Live with purpose.

Educate yourself; stay informed; surround yourself with positive, supportive, well-informed people.

Do not simply accept that something must be your fate...do something.

Life is an action word. Life is about using our senses (including common sense) and putting our little gray cells in our heads to work and standing upright and going headfirst. Life is about purposely doing and not doing.

So, are you complacent? Are you just going to sit there and take it? Are you watching from the sidelines and taking the knocks that come your way? Or are you actively participating in this thing we call Life...leaving a positive legacy, doing your part, taking part and stepping up? It's your choice....really. Over and out...

Anna

Photo Op {Pro-Woman....Need I Say More?}

Isn't it funny how a place can feel like home even when you haven't been there for years and years and all the memories come flooding back and you can navigate by instinct? Well, last weekend I was in Austin, Texas; my birthplace; the capital city of Texas. We were there with lots of other Berends for a cousin's wedding and staying just off the Congress Ave. bridge; the one where millions of bats live (aside – a very cool thing to see at sunset).

It was the first trip to Austin for our sons. I was so excited to show them the Texas State Capitol and regale them with stories my childhood memories of visiting this magnificent building on school trips and with my mom and brother during summer excursions and playing and picnicking on the beautiful grounds and how my birth (& my brother's) had been proclaimed in the legislative chambers and of my great uncle, a state representative, etc.

It was a hot day; 104 degrees we later found out. The boys had complained of walking too far in the intense heat on our way to brunch (remember, they're Minnesotans). Our most helpful waiter told us we could catch a city bus for $2.50 just a across the street from the Snack Bar (sidebar – this is an amazing, delicious, fresh, farm to table, very accommodating café on S. Congress – go there if you have the chance!) So, we did; getting off just a few blocks from the capitol building and walking up the street, capturing all its grandeur and all my memories, as we did.

As we walked, a sign caught my eye. It was written in red marker on a white poster board and it had been stuck into the wall of a boarded up storefront. It made me think of that magical night just a few weeks back when there was that possibility that women could win a battle over choice and autonomy when it comes to their own bodies; that night when Wendy Davis stood, unwavering, for 11 hours, prepared to go longer, intending to go longer; that night when men and women filled the layers of that awe striking white rotunda, going up and up and up; cheering and shouting. The images I saw made me long to have been there; filled me with gratitude and admiration for leaders like Wendy Davis who refuse to stand down just because it's a difficult battle and an unpopular opinion. It made me proud to be a woman from Texas.

This photo is of the sign I saw on Congress Ave just two blocks down from the Texas Capitol last Saturday. Need I say more.... Over and out....

Anna

Love Wins {Marriage Equality in MN}

And then there were 12

I had just parked at the library. The boys had unbuckled and were bouncing around the van, ready to go pick out some books. I decided to check Facebook one more time to see if the MN Senate had voted yet.

The first five or so posts that met me as I scrolled through my stream immediately told me that Minnesota had indeed passed the Marriage Equality Bill (which Gov. Dayton will sign today), allowing for gay marriage in our state.

I happily announced it to the boys. I explained once again what that meant for the people of our state. And tears flowed from my eyes.

The boys said, "Why are you crying? You're already married." They asked me, "Why are you sad?"

I explained that they were tears of joy. And yes, while their dad and I are already married, this law will mean that many loving, devoted couples can now be married, as we are, if they so choose.

I couldn't help but think of our friends and family who are affected by laws that discriminate against them and their loved ones. I couldn't help but think of all of those who feel liberated and empowered by this new law. I couldn't help but think of the future generations and what this law will mean to them.

Marital Status

This law has nothing to do with sexual relations. This law is about the basic rights of a married couple both in life and in death. This law is about giving adults of sound mind, regardless of sexual orientation, the right to marry whom they choose. This law is about giving couples basic rights regarding insurance coverage, hospital visits and medical information, testamentary rights, tax status and deductions, and more. This is a legal distinction; this is a human rights distinction.

People can live together, sleep together and spend their lives together without a marriage certificate, so long as they choose to and are of legal age. That wouldn't change whether this law had passed or not.

In addition to the legal rights afforded by this law, what changes is the legitimacy of these relationships from the perspective of others. The level of commitment won't change for the couple who has devoted the last 20 years to each other, regardless of legal marital status, but it will change the way the world views them. They will be married; they will be connected in the eyes of the state; they will be one unit for all to know and recognize.

Marital Injustices

It wasn't that long ago that the issue being discussed and legislated was marriage between a white person and a person of color.

In Loving v. Virginia, the 1967 U.S. Supreme Court case that made inter-racial marriage possible in every state, Justice Earl Warren wrote, "Marriage is one of the 'basic civil rights of man,' fundamental to our very existence and survival.... To deny this fundamental freedom on so unsupportable a basis as the racial classifications embodied in these statutes, classifications so directly subversive of the principle of equality at the heart of the Fourteenth Amendment, is surely to deprive all the State's citizens of liberty without due process of law. The Fourteenth Amendment requires that the freedom of choice to marry not be restricted by invidious racial discrimination. Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the State."

Yes, Justice Warren was specifically discussing racial discrimination, but in so many ways, we're talking about the same thing. Opponents of Marriage equality among gay couples fear that it will ruin the institution of marriage; that it will hurt our kids and damage our country's morals. Opponents of inter-racial marriages made of a lot of those same arguments.

The Scoop

I'll tell you what hurts our kids and damages our country... It's hate and fear and closed hearts and minds. It's the idea that one group knows what's best for another group. It's failing to love each other regardless of our differences and our similarities and in spite of them.

And so it was with tears of joy and gratitude and pride that my Christian, hetero-sexual, happily-married-to-a-man, heart swelled with rainbow-colored pride when I heard the news that MN had just become the 12^th state in the U.S. giving all adult couples the option of marriage! Thank you, MN Legislators!

I will respect your opinion, even if I don't agree. Will you respect mine? Over and out...

Anna

Leaving Children Behind....in the Lunch Room

Feed Their Minds and Bodies

Here's what I think...All children, no matter race, creed, national origin, address, tax bracket or any other factor should have food to eat. No child should be left behind without a meal to eat at school.

Going hungry teaches desperation, heartbreak, bitterness and misunderstanding. Providing school lunches does not teach laziness, greed or a sense of entitlement; they are not handouts. Food is a basic necessity of life.

Children who are fed learn better, listen better and are happier, more focused and participate in class. Children who go hungry are cranky, listless, tired and poor students.

I'm not a dietician, a physician, a psychologist or a social worker. I'm a mom. This is common sense. Kids should have enough food to eat in the "greatest country in the world."

The Politics of Feeding Kids

Politics should not figure into this issue. Unfortunately, it has to if there is to be money to feed kids who do not have food at home to bring to school for lunch, and who more than likely will go without breakfast and snacks too.

Yes, there are programs for free and subsidized lunches, but there are limits regarding who is eligible for those programs. And in our economically depressed country, often the working poor are suffering greatly in reality, but on paper it appears that they are making the ends meet and therefore, do not qualify for these school lunch programs. Or perhaps these kids qualify for the reduced cost lunch program, but even that is just too much for the family. Or maybe there are language or cultural barriers or misunderstandings or miscommunications that cause kids who would qualify for these programs to never become enrolled and end up going without.

Turning Kids Away

Regardless of the situation of why kids are going hungry at school, the point is it is happening. According to a Star Tribune article, Legal Aid along with four Minneapolis law firms conducted a survey of the 182 school districts in Minnesota regarding school lunch policies and here is some of what they found:

"30 Minnesota school districts have some form of 'turn-away' policy, ranging from allowing the child a limited number of hot meals before stopping, to turning even the youngest grade-schoolers away immediately.

Seven districts stamp children's hands as a deterrent to nonpayment. One district issues a 'red card' after four unpaid lunches, while another issues 'purple tickets' for nonpayers.

One district brings a child into the kitchen where the hot lunch is taken away and exchanged for a bag lunch. Another takes the lunch tray away at the end of the line.

Diplomas are being withheld from some nonpaying high school seniors. Bill collectors are going after some of their parents."

According to a MPR article, about 20% of the school districts in MN have some form of turn-away policy.

The Star Tribune reports that Minneapolis, Anoka-Hennepin, Delano, Robbinsdale and Brainerd do provide hot lunches to their students whether the kids have the money to cover the cost or not while St. Paul offers a sandwich to non-paying kids.

Footing the Bill

There are bills moving through the Minnesota legislature that would expand the budget for free school lunches. According to the MPR article, Minnesota currently provides about 250,000 free lunches per school year. Advocates of this bill would like to increase that number by about 62,000.

This is not the first time such a bill has been introduced, but Jessica Webster of Legal Aid, who has been instrumental in putting together this information, getting the word out and gaining support for this issue, is more optimistic with the increased backing by key people.

Part of the problem is that school district budgets are already strapped. Where will the funds come from for these extra meals? Funding is a major concern for many school administrators and yet children going through the school days without enough food in their bellies should be equally vital concern for these administrators.

The Scoop

Sen. Sean Nienow, ranking minority member on the Senate Education Finance Committee, was quoted in MPR article as saying, "That may be tight, but most of those families probably can pitch in."

While this may be the case some of the time, with some of the families, he who has never been in such a situation does not know how very tight it can be on some days, some weeks or some months! When a parent must decide whether to pay the mortgage/rent or the electricity/gas or buy groceries or buy gas to be able to get to work and there is no wiggle room, that's a difficult, gut-wrenching, heartbreaking decision. We must be able to walk in another's shoes and see how the world looks when it's very dim with nowhere to turn in the immediate future.

And we must take care of our children; the children who will grow up and build and govern and create and have families and teach and guide and take care of each other. We focus on "no child left behind" and work to be sure that each child learns the basics of reading, writing and arithmetic, but what about the basic necessities of being fed enough food and being nourished, body and soul.

I have contacted my school district's superintendant to inquire about the policies in my district. I hope you will do the same. Fortunately, there are some angel donors, teachers, principals, lunch room staff, etc. who take matters into their own hands, regardless of what school policy is and reach out to the children without and provide them with sustenance. And to those kind and generous souls I say thank you. But this is not enough. Minnesota, you can do better! Over and out...

Anna

 

Random Tidbits: On a Rampage {Strong Opinions}

New Rules

I've been juggling a lot with work lately, which means that everything else suffers. So, I've decided to make some rules for myself, and I'm really trying to stick with it.

I'm setting weekly office hours. We're holding weekly family meetings with an agenda, a white board and an Angry Bird (that's a whole other post...stay tuned). I'm standing firm on what I can and cannot add to my overly stuffed schedule...and refusing to feel guilty about saying "No" when I need to.

Unfortunately, one of the things that has taken a backseat to being a priority lately has been writing. So, I'm trying this Random Bits style again...cuz you know I have things to say, but just not much time to get them said!

Bits and Pieces

1. Y'all know how I feel about using your phone and driving, right?! If you don't then read this: I Hit A Child with My Car and all the other Distracted Driving posts I've written. Well, my friend, Trina, a dedicated Phone Down, Eyes Up driver sent me this photo that her friend sent to her. I love it! And there's a lot of truth in this statement...believe it.
   
2. In DC, a Councilmember has introduced a bill to curb cheating. If passed, it would make facilitating cheating on standardized tests illegal. Now I'm certainly against cheating, but what troubles me is that there has to be such laws in place to prevent school personnel from tampering with tests.

   Shouldn't this be a given to teachers and administrators? Perhaps, the better answer is to take a look at why there is such a need to "fix" standardized tests in this district and examine the education resources and funding.

3. Apparently there is overcrowding at the Metro Louisville jail in Kentucky. The solution? Well, USA Today reports that "tech-savvy professionals will use technology and data to study the overcrowding," of course. The pros will be trying to find some possible solutions.

   News Flash! I've got a solution. Use that money to study how to get kids off the streets, keep them safe, educate them, and get them out of the cycle of committing crimes-jail-committing crimes-jail that many of their older siblings, parents, aunts and uncles and friends are in instead of employing "tech-savvy professionals." This is not an engineering/spatial problem; this is societal issue, a human interest story that could have happy ending.

4. Lastly, the total cost of the 2012 elections, from federal to state to local offices, was...hold on to your boots, friends... $7.3 BILLION (according to Politico.com)! WHAT A WASTE! Don't get me started on what that could have been spent on. This amount of money could have made a huge impact on many of the very causes and issues and institutions and families addressed by the candidates running for office. So many could have been greatly benefitted by even a fraction of this money being spent in a positive way. Here are more of my thoughts on the subject of political campaign spending.

The Scoop

Hmmm, it turns out I'm full of opinions this Monday morning. Well, there you have it. Over and out...

Anna

Sticky Messes: Good Guys v. Bad Guys {Biggest Gun Wins}

Cleaning up Messes

My kids are really good at making huge messes. They don't mean to; they're just busy playing, creating some playscape or making confetti or trying to help by pouring their own juice or milk.

The result is something sticky covering the floor, splattered on the counter and cabinets and inevitably on the boys themselves, bits of paper everywhere, pillows, blankets and stuffed animals scattered throughout the house, draping over this or that, pulling down lamps and picture frames.

I know I should make them clean up these disaster zones, but I know from experience generally their version of cleaning up a mess only results in bigger messes that make me a steaming, angry, stressed out mom; which is another type of mess altogether.

So, I banish them from the desecrated area, and I clean up the mess. They do have to clean up toys scattered about; it's just these sticky, dirty, destructive messes that I take over.

Yes, I know. You're shaking your head and thinking. "That's the way to spoil them and make them think they can get away with anything."

Perhaps, but it keeps me sane, and avoids the chance of a headline like this, "Mom loses mind, runs screaming from home, never to be heard from again after sons attempt to clean up spilled apple juice with down comforter, only to rip seam and allow all the feathers to float through house, adhering to all sticky surfaces covered in apple juice, including the boys and a giant dog."

Sometimes it's just better to step in and take control of a smaller, still fixable mess before it becomes a giant, sticky, slippery slope heading straight down the tubes.

Guns in Schools

A few days before Christmas I happened to see a newspaper headline, "NRA leader urges armed guards in every U.S. school." Surely not.

I read more. "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun," says NRA executive vice president, Wayne LaPierre. Hmmmm.

While I agree that gunmen on rampages who seem to all too often end up in schools of some level is a definite problem, I don't agree that throwing more guns into the mix is the answer.

The NRA's current plan is like standing to the side and watching my sons spill a gallon of apple juice all over the counter, the floor, the cabinets and themselves as they attempt to pour a small amount into a child-sized cup, then letting them clean it up with the socks on their feet and whatever else they can find to sop of the sticky liquid, leaving the residue behind to collect hair and dust and dirt, turning the whole thing into a filthy mess.

That doesn't solve or teach anything.

I realize that there are a number of schools in large cities that already have trained armed guards/off-duty police officers patrolling the halls, approximately one-third of public schools or 23,000 schools to be precise. I acknowledge this is necessary to keep the students in those schools safe, but I do not find this statistic to be an acceptable standard for schools.

Good Guys v. Bad Guys

This figure alone speaks volumes about the state of our country and the culture we live in. It saddens me to no end. But this proposed "solution" from the NRA enrages my faculties, breaks my heart and frightens me.

More guns, especially guns of the caliber and capacity that match those that the "bad guys" have access to do not belong in our schools. What lesson does this teach? The "bad guys" have big guns; well, the "good guys" will just get bigger guns.

Where does it end? Why stop at schools? How about movie theaters, churches, all government buildings, federal, state and city, malls, parks, the grocery store, libraries, parking garages, and every other public building? Perhaps it should be mandatory that every household owns an assault rifle. That ought to stop the "bad guys."

Of course, if we're all running around with guns all the time, that might make it difficult to tell the "bad guys" from the "good guys." Then what would the NRA propose?

Better Laws

I don't have all the answers, but I feel certain that adding more high powered weapons to our warped society is NOT the answer.

I am not advocating for all guns to be ripped from lawful gun owners' tight grasp. But I do support bans on assault rifles and high-capacity ammunition clips; weapons that belong only on a battlefield, if anywhere at all; weapons that can wipe out a great number of people in a few short seconds; weapons capable of ripping gaping holes in bodies and exploding through flesh and vital organs.

Weapons of this nature go far beyond hunting and "protecting" your home and family. If you oppose this type of ban, please explain to me the need for such devastating weapons.

Of course, bans are not the only aspects to be considered. Historically, horrible killing sprees that have taken place in schools, malls, churches, offices and theaters are carried out by people who have a mental illness of some sort. Therefore, mental illnesses, detection and treatment are also issues to be considered.

The Scoop

Call me naïve, but I don't want to live in a world where "the only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun." And I just don't think we have to live in such a world...if we wake up and proactively start dealing with this issue.

The current gun laws are not adequate. We don't necessarily need more laws, but better laws. I challenge our lawmakers to disregard the powerful, $12-billion-dollar-a-year gun industry and its puppet, the NRA and find a way that protects our citizens' safety and rights. Over and out...

Anna

Getting a Handle on Health “Care” {Fighting the Flu and the System}

Urgent Care

I dragged my achy, feverish, hacking body out of bed, put a hat on my head and headed to a HealthPartners urgent care on Sunday evening. It was Day 6 of a losing battle with the flu. I was concerned that it might be turning to pneumonia and wanted a suggestion on how to get this horrendous cough to stop long enough for me to sleep and not wake up choking and gasping.

What I got was tired, used up, rude and rushed. I was the only patient in the waiting room, but I waited 45 minutes, which didn't ruffle my feathers at all. I was in a peaceful, quiet waiting room; I can't complain about that. My family had left me and walked up the block to eat dinner in a café.

When I was called back, it was just past closing time; something I had already noted. The nurse was friendly and compassionate, despite my awful cough and rasping, grating, whispering, squeaking, gravelly voice.

Lack of Care

Then, the nurse practitioner came in. She looked tired, but smiled. I was still hopeful.

But as I began to try to explain my chief complaints and concerns, she said, "I can't really hear you. Can I just get on with the exam? I was here late last night and it's been a long day."

To which I said, "I understand, I waited 45 minutes." To which she retorted, "45 minutes? Wow! That's an excellent wait time for this weekend."

To which I fixed my cold gray eyes on her and smiled and nodded. I now knew where we stood.

She did a quick exam and then sat down at the computer with her back to me, going through a checklist. She got to a line about my ears and said, "Well, your ears looked good." To which I said in a very firm whisper, "You didn't look at my ears."

At this point, she realized she was messing up. She tried to laugh it off with statements like "oh, I've just seen so many people this weekend;" "So sorry about that;" "Can I get you a bottle of water?"

Too late; I had already made a mental note to stop at the front desk and get the manager's name and number; and once I have a voice to be "heard" I will be calling to file a complaint.

In the beginning of the exam before even listening to my lungs, she asked me if I'd like a lung X-ray. I told I have no idea if I need one. Then, as I was leaving she said, "Well, I hope you don't have pneumonia." Really? Well, me too. That's why I came here!

Service with a Smile

Too harsh? I don't think so. I have high expectations of any customer facing profession. I have worked in customer facing positions at various points and in various capacities since I was 16. I have always had high expectations for myself in these roles too.

No matter whether the customer/patient/client you are seeing is #3 or #23 of the day, you better treat that person like he or she is the only person you are seeing that day. Tired? Feet hurt? Head hurt? Grin and bear it! Nothing less than what I have done myself. That's your job.

Where's the Love?

Unfortunately, this is not the only time I have received such poor health "care." Some months ago, I found myself feeling wretched a few days before I had to head out of town for work. I decided the quickest solution was to run to Target's "Minute" Clinic after dropping Darling 2 at preschool. I was the 5^th patient to be seen that morning, waited 45 minutes to see a doctor, only to be rushed through the exam because she had lots of people to see that morning. She even told me that she would ask the questions and all I needed to do was answer her. I flat out told her I'd never be coming back.

There are other ridiculous scenarios over the many of years of my life. And maybe it's just me; I somehow find all the quacks out there when I am at my sickest; or so it seems.

Fighting {For/Against} Reform

But here's my point; if this is the face of health care in our country why are so many fighting so hard against a reform?

If you honestly believe there is no room for improvement in care, both from the medical staff and the approach that is taken; you don't think that anyone and everyone in this country should have access to health care; including those with pre-existing conditions, young children and the working poor like the guy delivering you pizza on that cold, snowy night that you don't want to venture out in; and you see no room for improvement in our current insurance/medicare/medical care systems, then please leave a comment here explaining your point. I'm truly curious.

The Scoop

This issue is not about whether you fall in the red or blue category or whether you support our President. This is an issue about people, and the right way to treat each other!

And don't worry, Health Partners, I'll be talking to you soon, but I'm still trying to get over this flu...Day 10. Over and out...

Anna

A Pledge....for the Unity of Our Nation; Overcoming the Great Divide

I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

The election is over; the results mean joy and relief for some and frustration and concern for others. Regardless of where you fall on this wildly swinging pendulum of emotions and viewpoints, our nation is still one nation.

However, in my Facebook stream and in the various news reports the hatred, the misunderstanding, the ranting and the tirades and the closeness of the popular vote, reveal the deep and vast divide within our country.

And this is weighing on my shoulders.

I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Why should I care? What does it matter?

There was once an issue that deeply divided our country. The hate grew and grew and divided families and friends and a nation; it filled fields with blood; it burned cities; it destroyed lives; and in the end freedom prevailed.

Could there ever be an issue that divided our strong, enduring country again; an issue that brought our government to the brink of civil war again; that threatened to destroy life as we know it? I hope not, but this level of divisiveness after an election of our local, state and national leaders is worrisome.

I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Liberal and conservative; young and old; white, black, yellow, brown and purple; single and married; Christian, Jewish, Buddhist and atheist; accountant, nurse, teacher, business owner, farmer, lawyer and mechanic; we still pledge our allegiance to the same flag; to our one nation under God; together as one; because we care about our rights and the rights of our neighbors in the house next to ours and those in other states; and we believe our system of weights and balances won't fail us.

I believe we, as Americans, truly want to do the right thing by helping those in need and paying our fare share of taxes and being good citizens and working for our good and the good of all the people. I STILL believe in our government, in our laws, in our leaders and in our people, regardless of all the issues that divide us at the polls and in our daily lives.

Call me naïve, call me bleeding heart liberal, call me silly and stupid, but I will still believe and I will pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all...because I am STEADFAST and I am ETERNALLY OPTIMISTIC and I have the FAITH of a mustard seed.

Will you join me in this pledge? Will you continue to believe in our great country? Over and out...

Anna

Love: This Little Light of Mine, I’m Gonna Let it Shine

LOVE

True LOVE

Real LOVE

Deep as an Ocean

All encompassing

Love does not conform; Love won't be stopped by laws

LOVE does not Discriminate; LOVE understands; LOVE Forgives

LOVE Survives

Love Heals

Love Saves

God is

LOVE

As we near this year's very heated, passionate election day, please take a moment to remember to Love your neighbors, your friends, your family regardless of what they believe or advocate for or who they vote for or whose signs are firmly planted in their yards.

Love is the most important thing we have. Live by example; let your love be a roaring fire that shines out for the world to see; don't hide it under a bushel. Love is not shameful. Over and out...

Anna