Hanging By a Thread

Nanny Files {A Public Advert}

We're looking for a part-time nanny to start ASAP! We have failed to find a good fit since our beloved Katrina left the country to teach school! So, I thought long and hard, and this is what I came up with. Here's my description of the perfect {or nearly so} candidate for this position in our home:

Please don't apply unless you fit the following points:

1. MOST IMPORTANT! Must adore – and I stress ADORE – dogs, cats and boys!!
2. In college with 2 afternoons available (give or take a bit, noon to 5) and some evenings on the rather rare occasion that the Dear Husband and I get to have a date night;
3. Should be kinder and more patient than I am;
4. Enjoy playing at the park or in the yard, weather permitting;
5. Know the difference between Captain America and Captain Rex;
6. Enjoy sports;
7. Understand boys and the rough parts and tender parts;
8. Understand me and get along with me, the mom {not difficult at all if you are the right one for this job};
9. Realize that chaos and order can both reside simultaneously in one small home;
10. Not freak out about a little {or a lot} of Saint Bernard slime on your clothes; it happens...frequently. Relax, we have towels;
11. Really and truly like our family;
12. Have a sense of humor and a sharp wit and a knack for sarcasm;
13. Understand the 5 food groups and preparing a balanced meal/snack;
14. Have a vehicle of your own!
15. NOT text/talk/use for any purpose your phone while operating a vehicle – or at least be willing to adhere to this strict rule when any member of my family is in the vehicle or within viewing distance of you;
16. Understand the importance of picking up....toys, crumbs, crayons, bits of paper, dishes, etc;
17. NOT smoke;
18. Not show up earlier than your scheduled start time.

Am I asking too much? Is this list much too Mary Poppinsish? Perhaps, but maybe, just maybe there's another Katrina out there for our family!

If this sounds like you, then we just might be the family for you! Please email me ([email protected]) ASAP for more information about this position! I look forward to chatting with you!

Dear local readers, if you know of anyone who fits this description, please do forward this to that person!

Thanks,

Anna

St. Violet: Putting it All in God’s Hands

A year ago, our family lost our beloved St. Bernard, Benjamin. We still feel this loss; we still talk about our Ben; we still laugh about special memories; and sometimes shed tears for our boy. We always will.

But as we rounded the corner to Fall and got closer to marking the year without Ben, we began to talk about getting another Saint. Could we? Should we? There were lots of questions to be answered.

We all decided we were ready to find our next family addition; that is, one with a tail and fur and preferably one with lots of slob, like our Benjamin. We started to put out some feelers online; searching for the right breeder or perhaps a rescue, as Ben had been.

But St. Bernards are not cheap, and we're on a budget. So, after a while of looking online, sending a few emails, following a few leads that turned to dead ends, I decided it was time to put it in God's hands. I asked that He take the issue and just let us know when He had the right dog for us.

One week later, Will got an email from the breeder who had Ben's sister. Several weeks prior to this Will had emailed them when he saw that Ben's sister had died; telling the story of how we came to get Ben and to say that we had enjoyed looking at the photos on their site over the years and that we were sorry to see that Layla had died. They had replied to Will then, but this new email came with an offer.

They had recently rescued one of their dogs from a buyer who was no longer able to care for her; she was 2.5 years old; turns out she was Ben's great niece. They wanted to know, "Would we take her; no charge?"

Well, for me, this was an answer from God. She needed us; she was our dog. And so we answered a resounding "YES!" even though I thought our next dog was a male puppy. Sometimes, God has other plans though, and I could see that this was it.

So, meet our Saint Violet; as in, Violet Parr from The Incredibles. She resembles Violet Parr in more than the black mask; she was timid and unsure of herself when she came to us, needing lots of love and assurance. But over the last month, Violet has begun to build her confidence, realize that we love her and that this is her forever home.

She is the answer to our prayers as we gaze on her sprawled out on the floor and see our Ben; hear her resonating snore through the night and hear our Ben; and love on that giant, cuddly, slobbery head and feel our Benjamin's strong, but soft and gentle leaning hugs.

We needed her as much as she needed us. We're still getting used to each other, but she adores us, is protective of her boys, is working out how to play with Teddy, the kitten, and is slowly bonding with her new "sister" Abby. And we have been reminded of the challenges of living with a great, slobbery dog; the slime flip flapping everywhere, the water all over the floor, the frequency with which one must buy large bags of dog food and the urgency of picking up the yard often.

Nonetheless, on this Thanksgiving, we feel thankful for God's grace in all parts of our life this year, including our very own St. Violet. Happy Thanksgiving! Over and out...

Anna

5 Things You Should Know {About Life and Kittens}

Last November, we lost our dear, sweet, giant St. Bernard, Ben. In June, we lost our 17 year old black cat, Jazz, who was my guy. While we still mourn the deaths of these incredible pets, I decided we needed another little black kitten in our home again {and eventually we'll get another loving puppy}.

We quickly found a few on petfinder.com, but when I saw this guy I knew it was right. After having cats for almost 38 years, I can look into those shiny green or amber eyes and know...something I had a hard time convincing my husband of, but it's true.

Years ago, while in college, Will and I started with cats, graduated to dogs and eventually added the boys. So, our children have always been surrounded by older, many of them nurturing, pets. It was with great excitement that we added a tiny Jazzy cat look-alike late this summer.

It took the boys a bit to adjust to this teeny, playful, cuddly kitten, and Darling 2 was even a tad jealous of the new baby in the house. All is well now, and we all love our kitten, Teddy.

Our household needed some new energy; some joy; and we got it when we added this kitten. Here are 5 things you should know about kittens;

1. There is nothing more joyous, more enthusiastic, more curious than a little kitten when playing, exploring; figuring things out;
2. Kittens don't know they are tiny; they think that when they puff and arch and march sideways they are intimidating and tough and the size of at least a small lion;
3. Kittens don't give up; even when rejected by older, grumpier cats, or when their plots and plans are foiled to attack something or open something or reach something, they just keep coming back and trying again;
4. Kittens really know how to enjoy a nap; and
5. Kittens freely give and receive love and attention.

We could all learn something from watching kittens. Life is actually pretty simple; we just tend to complicate matters and get tangled up in our messes. Over and out...

Anna

Jazz: The Brightest of Eyes {An Obituary}

One morning back in the late summer of 1995, I woke up determined to get a kitten of my own on that day. I had just started my junior year of college. I was living in a tiny efficiency apartment. It felt empty without a cat. I had never in my life been without a cat until I left home to start college. Two years without feline companionship was enough for me.

I quickly realized it was a holiday; Labor Day. The humane society was closed. No, I couldn't possibly wait one day more. My friend, Julie, and I found a small pet store that was open. We were on a mission.

There was one kitten left from a litter. He was completely black with just a whisper of white hair on his chest and in his armpits. He had brilliantly shining golden eyes that didn't miss a thing; they never did. He was small, long-bodied and scrawny with giant ears and a extra long tail. He was almost two months old.

He was mine. I knew it immediately.

He was spirited from the git-go; pushing his head through the cardboard box they gave me to transport him home. He established right away that he would not be held back; his strong will would prevail.

He may have been scrawny and terrified of missing a meal, as if food had been withheld from him at some point in his short life, but he was always sleek and beautiful.

I named him Jazz. Over time, Jazz was also Joe, Joby, Jazzy Joe, Jazzbo and eventually yaz by the baby boys.

My Jazzy was a complicated soul. He was a difficult kitten; erratic and moody. Jazz had the broadest range of emotions of any cat I've ever known, and I've known a lot of cats. But, he was also sweet and cuddly. I knew with patience, love, tender care and companionship he would grow into a fine cat.

And I was right.

He was smart; very smart. He knew how to get what he wanted and to communicate his wishes to the "dumb humans" in his life.

One night while I sat studying, Jazz found a scrap of discarded paper that I had crumpled into a ball on the floor. He brought it to me and dropped it into my lap, standing and waiting for me to act. I instinctively threw the paper for him to chase.

I was surprised when he brought the paper back to me and dropped it in my lap again. This became our game. It was easy for me to throw paper balls for him while I studied and he got to run and chase and play.

It became the norm to find balls of crumpled paper under the couch, the fridge, the bed and in piles on the floor. This went on for the rest of college, all of law school and beyond.

Not long after I got Jazz, my sorority big sis gave me a little plush red devil for Halloween. Jazz immediately befriended that red devil. He wrestled him, slept and cuddled up with him and dragged him around the apartment. Red devil was almost as big as Jazz back then. He loved that red devil.

Eventually, red devil lost his cape, his leather-looking boots, his plastic pitchfork and the stuffing from his feet, but Jazz never stopped loving his friend. Until the very end, Jazz carried his red devil around when he was lonesome or bored or worried about something. His little red buddy was a constant comfort for him.

There are so many interesting, poignant stories about Jazz that I will treasure always.

Jazz grew and grew and grew. He was a big, fat, sleek cat. So beautiful; so faithful; so cuddly. He loved his cat sister and brother, teaching them the rules of the house and was always watchful for their safety. He tolerated the dogs joining the family and grew to love them too; sometimes even sleeping on his dog sister, Abby. Jazz was endlessly patient with the human baby boy that came along when he was 11 and accepting of the second baby boy when he was 13.

He slept on me in my bed most of the nights of his life. He loved human contact, especially with me, his mommy. He was my first baby.

They say that cats have nine lives. Well, Jazz was out to prove it. He came close to death numerous times starting with a bad reaction to the drugs when he was neutered; then there were several bad urinary tract infections; then a stroke four and half years ago.

I thought I had lost him then. After a middle of the night emergency vet visit and a $500 vet bill, he came home unable to walk, but without any answers from the vet. I did two things I do well. I prayed and I got online searching for answers. I tearfully begged him to hang on; and he did. I was not ready to let go yet.

I deduced he'd had a stroke. My research assured me he could recover. I fed him water and chicken broth with a baby medicine syringe for days; I changed his bedding several times a day, as he was unable to stand. Little by little he came back to me. Within two weeks, he was himself again.

Then, in the last year, he began to lose weight; he got wobblier and wobblier; and a bit leaky. But his eyes were as bright as ever. He was still determined.

Our new vet said he'd probably have another stroke; one worse than before. Well, he did. Last night he suffered a stroke, rendering him without the use of his limbs. He spent his last hours on his favorite blanket and with red devil next to him; those eyes burned bright until his last breath.

Jazz went to be with God and joined our St. Bernard, Benjamin, in heaven the morning of June 5, 2012. He was just shy of 17 years old. He lived a good life. He lived and died on his terms; that's just how he did things.

We are heartbroken for our loss, but relieved that he is no longer in pain; watching him suffer was too much. He will always be my first baby, and will be remembered as the smartest, most devoted cat to my knowledge.

A few weeks ago, Jazz started sleeping against my head or next to my face on my shoulder. It seemed he couldn't get close enough to me. I think he knew his time was limited. And deep down inside I did too.

Anna

DOG|GOD: Reflections on a Loss

It helps to talk about him often; even in the ordinary, everyday kind of conversation. His loss has been hard on us. Just when you think the deep grief has passed one of us has a sudden moment of sadness. I wasn't sure how much his death would affect our Darling Boys.

After all, they are just 5 and half and 3 and a half; how much would they understand about death and loss? Their responses have been varied and different.

Darling 1 has always been very matter-of-fact about all issues surrounding God and heaven. So, he has easily accepted that our beloved Saint, Ben, is in heaven with God, but refuses to talk about memories of Ben because it makes him too sad. He more openly grieved at the time of Ben's death, unlike his brother.

Darling 2 was exceedingly angry at the moment of Ben's death and in the months since. This was heartbreaking to watch. Darling 2 even asked for a little stuffed St. Bernard puppy for Christmas.

But recently as I was working on my computer with my ear buds in and Pandora station blaring and Darling 2 was sitting next to me watching a children's program on TV, I happened to look at him and saw that his big lower lip was stuck out and he was on the brink of tears. Even with my ear buds in I quickly figured out what was happening.

In the cartoon he was watching a character's pet caterpillar had "died" or so the character and her friends thought. Of course, this pet had not died, but came out of the cocoon as a butterfly. I realized what Darling 2 was thinking about and reassured him that this pet caterpillar was fine.

He told me he was very sad about Ben and cried. He remained in this state for several hours holding on to his little stuffed St. Bernard, finally openly grieving Ben's death. Since that time, he has been able to talk about Ben without getting upset.

Darling 2 even helped me put the photo in the personalized memorial marker that Aunt Dodie gave us for Ben; smiling and laughing at Ben's Christmas photo with a wreath around his neck, taken years before Darling 2 was born. Darling 1 helped me place it under Ben's favorite tree in the back yard, asking me if he could sit next to the marker and talk to Ben. I assured him he certainly could.

Ben's {heavy} box of ashes sits on the desk in our bedroom in a velvet drawstring bag; his favorite room in the house; the room he slept in; the room he died in. We are somehow comforted by the presence of this velvet drawstring bag.

I test myself with his memory every so often; recalling the thickness of his huge ears; letting myself feel how it felt to hug his tremendous neck and bury my face in his soft fur; thinking of the loud thump, thump, thumping of his powerful tail, the flip flapping of his large jowls and the resonance of his low snore; and envision the sweeter than molasses look in his deep brown eyes.

Loss in a family is difficult no matter who or what it is. We all have to mourn in our own ways. It takes time to move on; which we will, but we won't forget one of the greatest of God's creatures. And we all feel certain we will see our gentle giant again.

Darling 1 says that Ben is with Papa K, Will's grandfather who passed away last August. He says it like he knows it to be true. I don't doubt him. Papa K loved dogs and always asked about Ben even though he never got to meet him. I like to picture them together, both happy as a lark together in the eternal light. Over and out...

Benjamin: A DOG Among Dogs (An Obituary)

Anna

Legal Tails: Laws Protecting Animals and People

A Fear of Dogs

Years ago when living in Iowa, I remember being at a friend's home for a small gathering of new acquaintances. These friends had two dogs, one of which was at least part Pit-Bull Terrier if not full-blooded, and also one of the sweetest dogs you might encounter. I recall another friend there who it quickly became apparent was terrified of dogs. My friends apologized for having theirs out and put them in the basement away from the party.

The terrorized friend then related her story of being attacked by a friend's dog years earlier. This dog had never attacked anyone before, but had lunged at her, and she was severely injured and taken to the hospital. Her physical scars had healed, but her mental scars will probably never go away. If this had happened to me, I would probably have different feelings about dogs. When I see a dog that is powerful and intense, I think of her story.

In Reference to Yesterday's Post {It's easier if you just go read it: Animal House}

In yesterday's post I gave you a detailed account of my crazy chaotic household full of cats, dogs and kids. You now know how I feel about animals in general {I love them...in case you missed yesterday's article} and you know that my pets and kids mix and mingle and all equally share the home with us.

Yesterday I also shared two examples of when the mix of pets and kids goes awry with very disturbing facts and endings. A reader alerted me to another similar tragic incident that occurred just a few days prior to the 2 week baby being mauled by the family dog in Houston. This story comes from North Carolina. Five dogs were taken away after one or more of them attacked and killed a 9 day old baby girl. Among these dogs there is at least one Rottweiler and one Pit Bull Terrier. The authorities are also investigating that incident to determine whether criminal charges should be issued or whether this was simply a horrible tragedy.

These news stories are frightening and might be enough for some people to rush to conclusions about parenting styles or about having pets at all if kids are in the house. These stories are not meant to scare or threaten anyone. There are many wonderful reasons to expose kids to pets. They are simply a reminder that pets are animals and can be unpredictable at times. If we make sensible choices and err on the side of caution then most situations can be avoided.

It's important to realize there's a lot we don't know about the dog mauling cases: we don't know whether the dog(s) had been introduced to the infant through smells, etc., whether the parents knew or should have known reasons to keep the dog(s) and baby separated, whether the parents were negligent in failing to keep the two separated and whether the parents were diligent in their care of their infants. The investigations of these two terribly sad incidents will determine the answers to these and other questions in deciding whether to charge anyone with a crime. Regardless of any of these facts, two families have lost their tiny, innocent, brand new babies, and I doubt anything else matters to them at this time.

It's also important to note that none of the dogs have been sentenced to death at this point which probably indicates that none of the dogs have had any run-ins with the law before; meaning no previous reports of biting, etc., up-to-date vaccination records and current licenses. Once the investigations have ended, the fate of these dogs will also be determined. {By the way, the python from yesterday's scenario was spared and is in the custody of the state now. Given the fact that she was being starved to death by her owners having not been fed for over a month and was severely underweight she was not blamed for this death.}

Protecting Your Household and Others

These are things you should know already, but let this serve as a reminder. Again, we sometimes forget these basic requirements of pet ownership. In order to protect your pets, yourself and others, you must keep your pets' vaccines current, renew licenses and keep your pet in its cage, inside a fence, on a leash or whatever enclosure is appropriate for your pet.

If you don't have an umbrella insurance policy, you might look into getting one that would cover the defense and damages of an incident involving your pet and another outside of your household {Check with policy/insurance agent for details regarding coverage.}

It's also important to be familiar with the local, state and federal laws that apply to you and your pet, depending on the type of pet you have. Laws regulating pets are centered on three basic principles: public safety, public health and animal welfare. That is to say, it's the intent of the authorities to protect the public against brutal and often fatal attacks of the owner, members of the household or a member of the public; prevent the spread of diseases, often diseases that are not native to the U.S. or animals here; and put a stop to animal neglect and animal cruelty, which so very often occurs with exotic pet reserves, horse farms or puppy mills.

Local Laws

For the most part, if you have only domestic pets, rather than exotic pets, local ordinances basically provide for licensure and leash requirements and may limit numbers and size of animals, etc. Licensing will ensure that pets are being regularly vaccinated for rabies and any other required vaccines. Licensing also aids in tracking and identifying missing or found pets.

If you are new to a city or a new pet owner or both, be sure to check your local ordinances regarding pets.

Exotic Pets and Laws

If you have exotic pets, there are many other laws and regulations that will apply to you on local, state and federal levels. The definition of exotic pets varies from state to state. So, if you have any question whatsoever as to whether your pet is "exotic" and whether there are laws that apply to your pet, check your area's ordinances, statutes and regulations on all levels.

State Laws

Due to the level of concern over attacks by animals and animal neglect by the owners, more states have passed laws banning certain types of animals in the last decade or so. If you are considering getting an exotic pet, which this term can include some reptiles, fish and birds that may not seem exotic to you, be sure to check the law prior to getting your new pet. For a comprehensive guide to state laws regulating animals, check Born Free USA.

Federal Laws

There are a few federal laws that apply to pets, such as the Endangered Species Act and the Animal Welfare Act. For more information on these laws and current legislation regarding federal law and animals, check Born Free USA for their list of federal bills they are tracking, etc.

The Scoop

Overall, the message is this, know the law and follow the law for your sake, your pet's sake and for other's sake too in regards to pet licensing, vaccines and leashes, cages, fences, etc. Tomorrow I'll be discussing tips for keeping your kids safe around animals. Over and out...

Anna