5 Things You Should Know {Leavin’ on a Jet Plane; Simple Airplane Etiquette}

I'm fresh off an airplane, and I've made some observations....not surprising, I know. The thing is people are interesting, and I'm always watching, listening and soaking it all in and of course, making recommendations....

1. Rear Loading: For the love of Pete, why oh why are planes not loaded back to front; Diamond Executive Platinum, Triple Gold Crown, Head Honchos and Hallowed Ones could walk on at their leisure right before the plane took off and not ever to have lay eyes on the rest of the herd at the rear of the plane; the common folk. And we, the common folk, could easily find our way to our seats row by row, from the last row to the front row. Makes sense, no?
2. Polite Hygiene Practices: Dear Sirs, if you can't aim for the toilet and make it within the ring, do us ALL a favor and sit down! And if you make a mess, PLEASE clean it up. This is not an inner city subway bathroom or a field or forest miles from all civilization; be courteous to those who must use the facilities after you;
3. Heavyweight Workout: For those who find it hard to leave home without everything, as I do, there ought to be luggage with a scale built into the bag. This would really simplify things and ease my nerves about my overstuffed bag as I check-in.

   Let me just add, I am very suspicious of people who can check one small suitcase and skip onto the plane with a teeny tote bag. Seriously, have you no business to conduct on your computer or tablet, no need for makeup to touch up with, no extra undies, in case your bag is lost (hey, it happens), no books to read or celeb mags to catch up on, no sweater in case of a chill? Do you pack only one outfit and one pair of shoes? How do you do it?

4. Stuff It and Slam It. If your rolling carry on stuffed to the gills won't fit in the overhead compartment, stuffing and pushing and huffing and puffing and slamming and ramming will not get yours to miraculously fit. And if you are one of the last to board, you will most certainly be out of luck; so plan for it and don't act exasperated and shocked when all space has already been claimed. And no, it's not OK to smash aforementioned fellow passenger's teeny tote just to make room for your super-sized "carry-on" that should have been checked to begin with.
5. Positive Reinforcement: On my ride back home to Minneapolis, as we boarded our jet, the passengers were met with soft, uplifting music wafting through the fuselage and photos of beautiful landscapes playing on the video screens throughout the plane. I have to say, I have never seen such courteous, kind, helpful passengers, smiling, joking, exchanging pleasantries, moving out of the way, hefting a heavy bag for a stranger, re-arranging their own bags to make room for others' bags.

   It was a full flight and there were no cross faces or frustrated exchanges or sarcastic comments observed by me, and be assured I was watching. I sat in the middle of the plane, on an exit row, smack in the middle. This is a seat I hate to have; I'm an aisle hog. But I felt happy and settled with that music playing and the images slowly going by one after the other. I don't know what their intention was, but it worked to curb anger and keep everyone feeling cordial towards each other.

I have a few more notes, such as, house slippers are not considered shoes, not even at an airport and do listen to the attendants when they tell you to power down your devices; they mean it and no one, not even the triple platinum gold crown head honchos, are above this list of airplane rules of etiquette. Over and out...

Anna

 

 

Comments

[pb]

You are so absolutely right on each account! Hope someone listens!

[Shannon]

OMGosh! Item 1 is my biggest pet peeve when traveling. I swear whoever designed the boarding plan was never a "common folk/one of the herd" traveler. It would make SOOOOOOOO much more sense to load back to front.