For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way. Something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.
~Fr. Alfred D'Souza
This week, one of my husband's childhood friends was killed by a drunk driver as he drove home from work at 5:30 p.m. on a Tuesday evening. Matt was heading home to his wife and two kids. It happened in an instant. The two-time convicted drunk driver crossed the center line of a two-lane highway and hit Matt head-on. In one instant there is life; in another instant there is not.
Matt was pronounced dead upon arrival at the hospital. The drunk driver extricated himself from the wreckage and was promptly arrested after being checked out at the hospital, as is so often the cruel reality of such accidents.
I didn't know Matt. I don't know his wife or his two kids. I won't pretend to know or understand what they are going through losing a husband and father. But I do know this, I stand supporting her; crying silent tears inside for her and for her kids; my heart breaking for her; and sad memories flooding my mind.
I do know what it means to lose a family member at the hands of a drunk driver with multiple convictions. I do know the despair of sudden death; I do know the anger of knowing this person should have never been behind the wheel; I do know the sadness of forever missing that family member whose promising life was cut horribly short. I do know that these feelings never go away; I do know my memories of that person's voice, that person's innate goodness and that person's sense of humor will be with me always. I do know that the raw, gaping hole is never filled.
Life's cruel; life isn't fair; life's unpredictable; life's uncertain; life's a bitch. We can't change any of these things. But we can make sure we live every moment to the fullest. It's cliché, but it's true. We can laugh together. We can love each other. We can spend time making memories. We can spend time with people who truly matter to us. We can spend less time arguing, pouting, being irritated, doing the mundane. It's nothing more than a waste of our limited, precious time.
I am aware of 36 deaths this week, including the 31 troops killed in the Afghanistan helicopter crash, one of whom was my cousin's cousin; some lived many years on this earth; other's lives were cut far too short. But there is a silver lining too. My friend, Elle, gave birth to a beautiful little girl yesterday. Welcome to the world, Lila Jane! It's a beautiful place!
This post is dedicated to the lives of Matt Armstrong and Traci Ann Reynolds and the scores of others who've lost their lives because of the selfish, reckless actions of drunk drivers.
To the person whose actions killed Matt, whom I won't dignify by even mentioning by name: May God have mercy on your soul.
Please take a stand against drunk driving! None of us are immune from its effects. Can you tell this is not the last you are going to hear about this topic from me? My dander is up....hold on ya'll. Over and out...
It's Saturday…. Go eat some chocolate {this actually applies to everyday}. It's good for you, and you deserve it!
Anna
Nota Bene: I hold these truths to be self-evident, that all parents and kids are not created equally, but are wholly individual in personality and style. Regardless of these differences, the basic needs of love, patience and support remain constant. Here are the weekly affirmations, tips and reminders. Unless otherwise noted, these are entirely my opinion. Take them with a grain of salt, or not!
This is an issue worthy of dander-raising. It boggles my mind that inane laws are debated and passed every day, and yet important ones--like stricter regulations for repeat drunk driving offenders--are not. I am so sorry for your loss, and for your husband's loss as well. May tragedy lead to a triumph of justice....
Posted by: Chris | Saturday, August 13, 2011 at 08:29 AM
Great words of wisdom to embrace every day. I am so sorry for the loss of Matt and will be praying for his family.
Posted by: Trina | Saturday, August 13, 2011 at 08:31 AM