The Power of Mom: Preventing Child Abuse

Today, a friend forwarded me an email with kids' responses to questions about "Why God Made Moms." I'm sure you've seen it before. I had, but I read it anew and laughed and agreed once more. The answers are funny, insightful and sweet. Overall, the answers define "Mom" as powerful, in charge, aware, loving, necessary, kind, magical and basically there to meet the needs of the family. The "Mom" is not portrayed as interesting or with interests of her own, highly intelligent, with great professional experience or having accomplished important things. But that's not what kids see or care about. Kids want to know that they have someone who is going to give hugs and kisses, pick them up after a fall from the bike, make yummy meals, wash their favorite firefighter t-shirt, find Lightning McQueen hidden between the couch cushions, run to get the baseball hit over the fence, read to them at bedtime and come when they call out in the middle of the night. Now, we, as parents, know that a "Mom" is a lot more than the "bare necessities of life," but it's the basic stuff that counts when you're a kid.

April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month. Moms (& dads) are powerful. It is that power that can make a difference in a child's life, whether it is your own child, a child you know or one you don't. Here are some simple ways you can reach out and help kids and parents:

• Anything you do to support kids and parents can help reduce the stress that often leads to abuse and neglect.
• Be a friend to a parent you know. Ask how their children are doing. Draw on your own experiences to provide reassurance and support. If a parent seems to be struggling, offer to baby-sit or run errands, or just lend a friendly ear. Show you understand.
• Be a friend to a child you know. Remember their names. Smile when you talk with them. Ask them about their day at school. Send them a card in the mail. Show you care.
• Talk to your neighbors about looking out for one another's children. Encourage a supportive spirit among parents in your apartment building or on your block. Show that you are involved.
• Give your used clothing, furniture and toys for use by another family. This can help relieve the stress of financial burdens that parents sometimes take out on their kids.
• Volunteer your time and money for programs in your community that support children and families, like parent support groups or day care centers.

These tips come from: http://www.preventchildabuse.org/help/reach_out.shtml.

Here are some additional tips from the same website that you can use next time you feel that you are about to lose it (at least I found this list helpful for me!). It's a good one to post on the fridge where you can see it often to remind yourself of these simple defusing techniques:

Twelve Alternatives to Lashing Out at Your Child

The next time everyday pressures build up to the point where you feel like lashing out -- STOP!

Try any of these simple alternatives. You'll feel better... and so will your child.

• Take a deep breath... and another. Then remember you are the adult.
• Close your eyes and imagine you're hearing what your child is about to hear.
• Press your lips together and count to 10... or better yet, to 20.
• Put your child in a time-out chair (remember this rule: one time-out minute for each year of age.)
• Put yourself in a time-out chair. Think about why you are angry: is it your child, or is
your child simply a convenient target for your anger?
• Phone a friend.
• If someone can watch the children, go outside and take a walk.
• Take a hot bath or splash cold water on your face.
• Hug a pillow.
• Turn on some music. Maybe even sing along.
• Pick up a pencil and write down as many helpful words as you can think of. Save the list.
• Call for prevention information: 1-800-CHILDREN

http://www.preventchildabuse.org/publications/parents/downloads/twelve_alternatives.pdf

Prevent Child Abuse America's website has numerous articles and resources that are quite helpful in reaching this goal. Another website with loads of information and resources for preventing and identifying child abuse is Child Welfare Information Gateway,  http://www.childwelfare.gov/can/.

On Friday, I will post a bit of Motherly Advice. Remember that tomorrow, April 22, is Earth Day. Over and out…

Anna

Comments

[nic]

Great post, Anna. Thank you!

[Anna]

Thanks, Nicci! Glad you enjoyed it!
Anna